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16 Awards Everyone In Their Late Twenties Deserves

This one's for all the Ryans and Jessicas out there.

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1. For tirelessly sifting through a thousand scam "Free Credit Report" sites and coming out with an actual number.

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2. For surprising even yourself by saying "just one more" and actually meaning it.

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3. For taking real, positive steps to rid your body of toxins (whatever those are).

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4. For sitting through four different stilted readings of 1 Corinthians 13 and surviving.

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5. For fierce courage in the face of a slightly later school night than usual.

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6. For courageously emailing that dude from HR and telling him you didn't pay attention in the all-hands meeting about it.

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7. For getting $800 back from Federal and $27.50 from State.

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8. For leaving your roommate almost enough for a half-glass tomorrow.

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9. For bravery and tenacity in the face of GrubHub.

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10. For looking that smarmy gym employee square in the eyes and saying: "I have literally never stepped inside this place before."

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11. For gritting your teeth and drinking yourself to a place where it stopped mattering.

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12. For being able to proudly stand with your forefathers and say, "No! It's not a NORSBORG. I got it at West Elm."

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13. For determination, grit, and a slightly worrying number of trips to the bathroom in a 48-hour period.

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14. For reclaiming your lost youth (and leaving before anyone got any bad ideas about a second encore).

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15. For distracting yourself with Candy Crush just long enough to fall asleep in your clothes.

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16. And for fearless honesty, integrity, and class.

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