Skip To Content

    20 Times Ozzy Osbourne Knew Exactly What To Fucking Say

    SHARON!!!

    1. When he didn't know what planet he was on whilst conversing in a hallway with Sharon, his wife.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    2. When the phone rang and he didn't know what the fuck the sound was.

    MTV / Via pinterest.com

    3. When he gave sound advice to his daughter, Kelly, about her "vagina doctor" ringing her cellular.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    4. When he spent time trying to work a remote and got fuckin' NASA involved.

    MTV / Via pinterest.com

    5. When he couldn't figure out what the proper term for "attention span" was, and then gave up shortly thereafter.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    6. When he became increasingly paranoid and didn't know who or what was happening around him.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    7. When he, again, didn't know where he was, who was around him, what was happening, or when it was taking place.

    MTV / Via imgur.com

    8. When Sharon tempted him to try a new type of gum, but he hated it, so he reacted the way any levelheaded person would: he thanked her and called her a cunt.

    MTV / Via imgur.com

    9. When he told somebody sitting at the table not to start singing because their voice will be the demise of the fucking bird species.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    10. When his aspirations as a child were simply to unclog toilets, but he ended up chewing off a bat's ear and starring in a reality television show.

    11. When he thought he'd seen it all, then he realized he hadn't.

    12. When a blue pop-up appeared on his television screen and he asked what the fuck that shit was.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    13. When he told his son, Jack, that their remote control could give him a fucking blow job.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    14. When he didn't know what the fuck he was talking about at the dinner table.

    MTV / Via imgur.com

    15. When he thought you could feed a fucking tree by placing a ham sandwich next to its trunk.

    MTV / Via pinterest.com

    16. When he heavily sighed in his kitchen.

    MTV / Via rebloggy.com

    17. When he told somebody to fuck off.

    MTV / Via craveonline.com

    18. When he sarcastically thanked Sharon and he, yet again, called her a cunt in the middle of her hair and makeup routine.

    MTV / Via rebloggy.com

    19. When the Pacific Ocean bothered him, so he called it a fucking asshole ocean.

    MTV / Via pinterest.com

    20. When he went to bed and told his entire family to fuck off.

    MTV / Via pinterest.com