19 People Shared The Weirdest Things Their Partners Have Said In Their Sleep, And I'm Thoroughly Entertained
"My husband was dreaming he was a Budweiser frog, and he sat up, croaked, 'BUUUD,' and laid down again."
We recently shared a post in which married people told us the funniest things their partners have done in their sleep, and their responses were wild:
Well, readers chimed in with their own hilariously weird stories in the comment section, and they are just as entertaining:
1. "A few months after I got married, I was woken up in the wee hours of the morning by my sleeping husband sitting on his knees, hand over his heart, singing 'The Star Spangled Banner.'
2. "My boyfriend was sleep-talking and asked, 'Do I need a driver's license for bumper cars?'"
3. "Apparently, once in my sleep, I told my husband that we can't use his penis for currency.
"I still don’t remember it, but he swears it happened."
4. "One night, I tried to wake my husband up from a nap, and he responded, 'Sorry, I've already ascended.'
5. "My wife says some pretty weird things in her sleep, but the weirdest was when she said, 'Fuck me! And use your David Attenborough voice!'
"She doesn’t even know what she was dreaming about."
6. "I once told my husband to roll over because he was snoring, and he replied in an irritated tone, 'It's a cardigan, but thanks for noticing!' Then he angrily threw his body onto his stomach and continued sleeping.
"Wasn’t mad about him quoting Dumb and Dumber in his sleep."
7. "My mom's boyfriend once slammed his hand against the wall in his sleep and said, 'I want the fluffiest pink llamas you have!' and then just laid back down."
8. "Once, I had a dream I was petting a dog. Well, I woke up the next morning to my husband telling me I was petting him and stroking his head, saying, 'Good doggy.'"
9. "One time, my boyfriend tried to wake me for a little action. Well, I must have been dreaming that I was shopping because he said I turned around and said, 'Put your dick away — I'm not going to have sex with you in the middle of Dillard's!' then promptly flipped back over."
10. "My husband was dreaming that he was a Budweiser frog, and he sat up, croaked, 'BUUUD,' and laid down again."
11. "My (then) boyfriend was announcing The Price Is Right in his sleep and actually yelled, 'Come on downnn!'"
13. "My ex said that I rolled over to her while I was asleep, started crying, and asked her why I didn't make a dessert for the dog."
14. "Once, my wife mumbled, 'Where are the little teacher pimps? Their pockets fat with state money?'
"I immediately committed it to memory because it was the funniest shit I’d ever heard."
15. "My ex-girlfriend used to sleepwalk and sleep-talk, and one night, she went walking downstairs, got a bottle of water, brought it back to the bedroom, held it out in midair, and dropped it on the floor, saying, 'I love you, Bruce Dickinson.'"
16. "My husband once told me in his sleep, 'You did it, babe! You defeated Batman!'"
17. "Once, while I was sleeping, I whispered to my boyfriend, 'They'll never find you.' Luckily, we're both sleep talkers."
18. "Last night, my sleeping husband said, 'Nobody wants wieners in their stuffing!'
"Today he told me he’d been dreaming that I made stuffing for Thanksgiving and put hot dogs in it."