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    People Are Sharing The Secrets Their Parents Didn't Reveal Until They Were Adults, And I Was NOT Ready For These

    Thanks for the honesty, mom and dad, but I wish you hadn't told me.

    We all know that sometimes parents wait until their kids are adults to share their juiciest, messiest secrets they didn't think their kids could handle until now.

    Well, recently Reddit user u/skadarski asked people to share the secrets their parents didn't tell them until they were adults, and y'all, these are intense, shocking, hilarious, touching, and, frankly, messy as hell:

    1. "When I was growing up, there was a story going around about how a local prince wanted to marry me and offered things like cows for my hand in marriage. Well, when my father passed away, I went back to my home country and discovered that the prince was the president's son, and it wasn't an offer, it was a demand. The company my dad worked for had to smuggle us out of the country because he was going to make me his wife! I was a toddler, and this was going to be an arranged marriage for when I came of age."

    2. "That the reason my parents finally divorced after years of Dad's infidelity was that he had gotten my sister's teacher pregnant."


    3. "My house was burned down when I was a kid, and when I was an adult, my dad told me that my mom was actually the one who burned it down!"

    "He was away a lot, and she wanted attention. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder later."


    4. "When I was a kid, I was friends with the woman who lived next door. She would read to me, play with me, and take me on walks, and she was like my best friend. One morning, her dad was at my house when I woke up, and he gave me a painting she had made. My parents told me my friend had to move to another city for work and she had left the painting so that I'd always remember her."

    5. "When I turned 18, I got a letter from a distant aunt and uncle whom I hadn't seen since I was a baby. There were hundreds of pictures of me and them together when I was a baby — they used to babysit me a lot and take me on vacations with them. Well, my mom revealed that they used me to smuggle things and that at one point, they literally smuggled cocaine in my diaper!"


    6. "My grandfather was a small business owner who everyone thought was extremely frugal because he grew up poor. Later, we found out he spent a significant amount of his money on charitable causes and helped a lot of his employees with financial and legal troubles!"


    7. "When I was a kid, my dad accidentally hit a raccoon with his car. It had a baby raccoon with it that wasn't hurt, so we adopted it. We adored it, but we were not equipped to care for it. There was no lock or cage that could stop it, and it got into cupboards, ate our food and trash, and we'd find its shit in the most random places. Well, one day, my dad sat me down and told me that my raccoon had 'gone to live on a farm.' I was old enough to know what that meant, and I was heartbroken."

    8. "My parents revealed I had a much older half sister I didn't know about. Apparently, my father had got some girl knocked up in high school, and her parents didn't like him and thought they were too young to raise a kid, so they just packed up and moved. He knew she existed, but he never tried to locate her. Well, after I was in college, my sister had contacted him. Nobody bothered to mention this to me until I came home from college for Thanksgiving and a strange woman was sitting at the table. That's when my dad said, 'Meet your sister.'"


    9. "That my mom was on the cover of Playboy."


    10. "That when we went to go spend the weekend with my aunt and uncle, my mom and dad would do a little meth and clean the entire house from top to bottom in two hours...then go back to being 'Mom and Dad.'"

    11. "When I was 8, I got a cat named Toes — he was a big, fluffy gray kitty with white feet. Well, I went to visit my grandparents one weekend, and when I came home, my mom broke the news to me that Toes had been hit by a car and killed. I was terribly upset, but my mom took me to a shelter to adopt a new kitty right away. Years later, my mom called me, upset, saying she had something to tell me. Turns out, Toes wasn't hit by a car that weekend — he had climbed into the warm clothes dryer to sleep, and my mom didn't see him and loaded the dryer with a blanket she had washed. She didn't know he was in there until she opened the dryer an hour later."


    12. "My sister and I used to play with a doll we named and talked to and everything, and then one day it just disappeared. Years later, when I was a teenager, my mother told me that back then, she had seen Child's Play, and our doll was the same size as Chucky and looked really realistic. She completely freaked out and couldn't sleep, so she secretly threw my beloved sweetheart away. I still miss it."


    13. "When I was in college, my parents got divorced, and my dad gave me all of the information on what to do if he dies. He told me where things are, and he had me go to his bank to sign a document that would give me access to his account. While we were leaving the bank, he said, 'Your mother is not who you think she is. Everything you need to know is in my deposit box.'"

    14. "That the college fund they were always talking about had $148.74 in it."


    15. "My sister took a DNA test to get some insight into her ancestry. When she got her results back, they said 0% Italian, even though our dad is 100% Italian. So she waited for me to take the test and get my results before confronting my parents. And four weeks later, I got them, and sure enough, I also had 0% Italian! The test identified that my dad isn't my biological father, and when we asked my mom about it, she told us that she and my dad had fertility issues, so they went to a sperm bank."


    16. "That the reason they got divorced was that my dad was a swinger and my mom didn't like it."

    17. "My grandma owned a bar when I was growing up, but I didn't know until after she passed away that she also ran a huge bookie gambling service from that bar. Then it all made sense — the random police visits, the robberies..."


    18. "That my adopted brother was actually my cousin. We knew my aunt died in a car crash, but we didn't know that my uncle had been shot and murdered with his son in the room. His son was 3 years old at the time and was found alone with the body the next morning. He was always pretty troubled, and after we found out what he had gone through, it made sense."


    19. "My parents told me that my great-uncle had left me a large sum of money in trust for me to receive either at age 25, when I graduated from college, or when I was honorably discharged from military service, whichever came first. I joined the military right after high school, and when I had my DD 214 in hand, my parents took me to a lawyer who laid it all out! And because of the enhanced GI Bill, I didn't have to touch a cent of it for tuition — I bought a house instead!"

    20. "Several years ago, my dad dropped the truth bomb that when I was born, he didn't think I was his kid. My mother had had an affair, and they assumed I was an illicit love child. But as soon as I started growing, he could see a lot of himself in my features, so he eventually brushed if off. But gee, thanks, Dad. Not sure I needed to know that."


    21. "When I was about 7, we went to stay with my dad at his place in a Latin American country, and he died while at his office. Family members traveled late at night to take us home, and we didn't understand why. Well, when we arrived home, my mom and a lady from the school sat us down at the kitchen table and told us that he died for medical reasons. But it wasn't until years later, when I was about 21, that a distant stepbrother suddenly came back into my life and told me that my dad had been shot and killed at work. In the country where he lived, the police were very corrupt and could be bribed, and from what my stepbrother told me, they reported that he killed himself and closed the case."

    "But why would a father pay for flights for both of his young children to visit him for the holidays and then kill himself in his office? My father had money and a comfortable lifestyle, and I think that's why he was killed, but I'll never have any certainty of what happened that day."


    22. "My mom died giving birth to me, and I just found out a few months ago that I had a twin sister who died during childbirth too. She wasn't strong enough to survive. I think I stole all the good stuff inside."


    23. "When I was 18, my mom told me my dad had cheated on her with a woman named Kathy who often took me and my brother to her house when we were kids. She would even buy us computer games, and we loved her, but I never understood why my mom hated her until then. She ended up marrying my dad's best friend!"

    24. "That I had a half brother who was given up for adoption shortly after his birth. I met him when I was 13, when my mom had to tell me because he had become a police officer and was at our house to arrest my dad."


    25. "When I turned 18, my dad told me that he'd spent 10 years as a drug smuggler, smuggling cocaine and weed he would get in South America, put on small planes that landed in the Caribbean, and then move to Florida on super-fast boats that only ran at night. He even told me about being stuck in a bar in Colombia for an entire day during an attempted coup, and that more than once, he traded guns he stole to the FARC for cocaine!"

    What about you? Did your parents confess a secret when you were an adult that made you go, "WOW!" Tell us about it in the comments section, and you could be featured in an upcoming BuzzFeed Community post!

    Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.