With all the recent school closures due to the coronavirus pandemic, this week many parents are venturing into brand-new, nerve-racking, unknown territory: homeschooling our kids.
Here are some of the funniest tweets we could find about homeschooling your kiddos that will hopefully take the edge off, well, the edge:
1. On knowing exactly where to start:
telling my 6 year old about homeschooling for the next couple months and he asked if i had to do that when i was a kid and i said no and then he asked if chairs were even invented yet, so i think the first thing we’ll study is his fucking attitude.
2. On incorporating school events into your homeschooling schedule:
We’re having our own “Spirit Week” at home since there’s no school for the kids. Today, we’re kicking it off with “Meltdown Monday”.
3. On giving your kids the comfort of knowing what to expect:
Here is my toddler homeschooling schedule. Any questions? 8-10am: frozen 10-12pm: frozen 2 *lunch* 1-3: frozen 3-5:frozen 2 *dinner* 6-8pm: frozen *bed*
4. On running low on patience already:
Quarantine Day One: This could be fun! I’ve always wondered what it would be like to homeschool! Quarantine Day One [at breakfast]: SO HELP ME GOD, MOVE YOUR FOOT AWAY FROM YOUR BROTHER’S CEREAL BOWL OR I WILL FIND A SCHOOL IN THIS COUNTRY THAT IS OPEN AND DRIVE US THERE TODAY
5. On not being smarter than a fifth-grader:
[home schooling, day 1] Me: I know this is hard. 12: Me: I know it’s frustrating. 12: Me: But we’ll get through it. 12: Me: Now explain this math to me just once more, I’m very close to understanding it.
6. On adding some extra chores to the schedule because you can:
Our homeschooling curriculum includes: Honors Laundry and AP Vaccumming.
7. On not quite having the temperament to teach:
Me: *explains math problem* Tween: I don’t understand. Me: *explains the exact same way except more aggravated*
8. On finally understanding what your kid's teacher goes through every day:
Soooo, adjusting to some homeschooling during this time is going well. 👀👀👀😬
9. On the coronavirus laughing when we make plans:
me: I’m not cut out for homeschooling coronavirus: muahahahahaha
10. On creating our own curricula:
Looks like I'm homeschooling my kids for the next few weeks. These are my courses: - Making pancakes - Changing a tire - The 2015 Panthers season - Minding your own business
11. On managing difficult personalities:
The first hour of homeschooling started out strong, with some great reading comprehension exercises, and concluded with an epic tantrum over the fact that she can't watch Frozen 3 because it does not exist.
12. On you being the difficult personality you need to manage:
I'm homeschooling my kids. It's tough, especially having to take their lunch money off them & throwing their schoolbags over the hedge but we're getting there
13. On us all being in the same boat:
It’s like the 1st day of school pictures on Facebook except instead of holding signs saying what grade they are in, they are all at the kitchen table with a laptop.
14. On not being as in control as you thought you'd be:
We went from “home-schooling” to a roller skating party real quick. #homeschooling
15. On not having the right focus for the job:
There’s a reason I don’t do #homeschooling. I can’t focus on a single thing at a time. I’ve also gone looking for snacks like 10 times in the last hour.
16. On appreciating your kids' teachers so much more now:
My sister’s first day of #homeschooling
17. And finally, on knowing what your kid's teachers are worth, because you damn sure aren't cut out for this:
Been homeschooling a 6-year old and 8-year old for one hour and 11 minutes. Teachers deserve to make a billion dollars a year. Or a week.
Hang in there, parents, and stay safe!
