18 More People Shared The Worst Things They've Seen People Do At Funerals, And I Am Reeling
"She attempted to throw herself onto the coffin as they lowered it into the ground, and she knocked herself out."
We recently shared a post in which people told stories about the worst thing they've seen someone do at a funeral, and they were wild, y'all:
Well, some of our readers added their own mortifying tales in the comments section, and they were just as cringeworthy, bizarre, and worthy of an "OMG!"
1. "At my grandmother-in-law's funeral, one of her daughters attempted to throw herself onto the coffin as they lowered it into the ground, and she knocked herself out! We called an ambulance, and as they were lifting the daughter onto the gurney, my grandmother-in-law's sister passed out, and here we go again!
2. "I was an assistant funeral director, and my boss was introducing me to the officiating clergyman. Well, when I held out my hand to shake his, he bent over as if he was going to kiss it, which was bad enough...
"But then he flipped it over and — I kid you not — this man LICKED MY PALM! And he did it while maintaining eye contact, which made it a million times worse!"
3. "I was at a funeral where the minister's phone rang in the middle of the service, AND HE ANSWERED IT!
"We then watched as he talked to his wife for a few minutes, and then he spent the next 15 minutes telling us what his wife was doing that day, and why he thought he should answer the call."
4. "I was crying my eyes out at my grandfather's funeral when a childhood friend hit on me, saying that I looked 'super hot in black.'"
5. "I was at my friend's brother's funeral, and a girl walked up to the casket wearing a glittery halter top, a silver skirt that was slit all the way up her leg, and clear acrylic stripper heels. As she passed by, she was asking people who was up for 'clubbing' later.
"And when she noticed everyone staring at her, she said, 'What the fuck is everyone’s problem? You’re supposed to dress up for a funeral, duh!'"
6. "At my mother's funeral, my long-lost aunt asked me when my baby was due. I wasn't pregnant."
7. "At my grandmother's funeral, my 8-year-old niece — who had been secretly watching The Walking Dead with her older brother — loudly asked my sister when my grandmother was going to turn into a zombie.
8. "I saw my husband's younger cousin Charles at the luncheon after my grandfather's funeral, and he told us he'd started going by 'Chuck.' Well, I'm a middle school teacher who sings 'The Name Game' to learn names, so — of course — I went, 'Chuck, Chuck, Bo-buck, banana-fana fo...' Then I stopped when I realized what I was about to say...right in front of my husband's giant Mormon family.
"I was so embarrassed, I wanted to be swallowed into the ground."
9. "My dad's side of the family is white, but there are a lot of mixed and adopted children of other backgrounds in the younger generations. Well, the minister at my grandfather's funeral made a comment about how we looked like the United Nations."
10. "At my father-in-law's funeral, one of my cousins kept flirting with my father-in-law's son's wife. At one point, there wasn't a place to sit, and he patted his lap and said, 'There's a seat right here for you.'
11. "My aunt started screaming that the morticians put too much lipstick on my dead grandpa. She then pulled a tissue from her purse and started wiping it off while he was in the casket, leaving flecks of tissue stuck to his face."
12. "At the luncheon after my grandmother's funeral, the server was getting our drink orders, and my cousin — who had recently turned 21 — loudly asked, 'Can I get a sex on the beach?'
"There is no room for a sex on the beach at a FUNERAL!"
13. "A few of my police officer coworkers stopped mid-shift to attend my brother's visitation, so they were wearing uniforms. Well, the funeral director asked one of them if he could give him some cash to put on the books for his son, who was incarcerated in the county jail. You know, to save him a trip."
14. "When I was a kid at my uncle's funeral, one of my cousins next to me leaned in and said, 'Watch Aunt Fannie! She's going to try to climb into the coffin — she does it at every funeral.' Well, sure enough, she rushed down the aisle and tried to climb into the coffin!
"People were pulling at her to stop her, but it reminded me of the end of a James. Brown concert, where every time they thought he was done, he wasn't."
15. "The priest at the funeral for my husband's grandmother showed up to the cemetery in shorts, boots, and a chain wallet, with a hat shoved into his pocket."
16. "At my friend's great-grandma's funeral, one of her family members placed a stuffed bear in the coffin with her. People thought it was a little odd because she wasn't a stuffed-animal kind of person, but no one said anything...
17. "At my great-grandmother's funeral, several older men were hitting on me during the meet and greet — one even said, 'My wife said I could hug any beautiful woman I see, and you happen to be one of them!' Then he hugged me and rubbed his hand up and down my back. Turns out he didn't even know my grandma and had only met her once!
"I got him removed from the service."
18. "At my mom's funeral, someone told my cousin she looks a lot like her. She responded, 'It's not a great time to hear that.'"