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    27 Brutally Hysterical Parents Who Nailed The Hell Out Of Halloween With Kids In One Single Tweet

    "You might think my house is haunted, but it's just my kids leaving all the drawers and cabinets open."

    There's no question about it — Halloween as a parent can be hilarious as hell.

    So it's a good thing we have the seriously funny parents on Twitter to sum it up in all its glory:


    [carving pumpkins] Me: Need help buddy? 5: No, I do it myself 5’s pumpkin:

    Twitter: @dad_on_my_feet


    It’s important to teach your children moderation by only eating a couple pieces of Halloween candy when they’re around and eating the rest after they go to bed

    Twitter: @reallifemommy3


    You might think my house is haunted but it's just my kids always leaving the kitchen drawers & cabinets open.

    Twitter: @HomeWithPeanut


    Heard a rival dad is planning to hand out king size candy bars for Halloween so now every trick or treater that comes to my house is getting a full rack of ribs.

    Twitter: @simoncholland


    Pumpkin Patches are great places to take your family so you can profusely sweat in coordinating outfits while the kids fight over a 47.00 pumpkin

    Twitter: @maryfairybobrry


    10-year-old: You bought candy?! Me: It's not for us. It's for trick-or-treaters. 10: I'm a trick-or-treater.

    Twitter: @XplodingUnicorn


    Halloween activities with kids can be so fun like for instance earlier I dislocated my shoulder carving 3 pumpkins on my own while they watched Netflix and ate chocolate skeletons

    Twitter: @MumInBits


    The best thing about parenting babies and toddlers is that you can dress them up as like, a croissant for Halloween, they don’t give a shit.

    Twitter: @copymama


    A house of horrors for parents would be walking barefoot on Lego covered floors while hearing bedroom doors slam and whisper screams of their children repeatedly asking "why" and then discovering an empty coffee pot when they finally reach the kitchen.

    Twitter: @IDontSpeakWhine


    Why would I pay for a haunted house when I can wake up to my kid silently standing by my bed at 3 AM.

    Twitter: @simoncholland


    4: did you know that pumpkins start off green? Me: yes and then turn orange when they’re ready. 4: ok can you stop talking about pumpkins?

    Twitter: @ThatMummyLife


    Dads love telling other dads while trick or treating, “You scared me, Bob. Next time don’t come dressed as yourself”

    Twitter: @Chhapiness


    I don’t need a haunted house to scare me because I have a teen I have to wake up for school 5 days a week.

    Twitter: @sarcasticmommy4


    4: Want to hear a spooky story? Me: OK 4: *in a loud whisper* Once upon a time, there was a giant octopus.. Me: This IS scary. 4: *in a normal voice* It is! Because you don't even know he's really a ghost!

    Twitter: @DameSpunky


    My daughter wants to be really scary this Halloween so instead of a costume she is going to carry a school fundraising packet to every door.

    Twitter: @simoncholland


    Ok I just need to think like a 39-year-old -my 6yo, trying to find the Halloween candy I hid

    Twitter: @deloisivete


    My kid’s piano teacher told me he liked my Halloween shirt and I told him thanks but this is just how I dress.

    Twitter: @itssherifield


    Shopping for Halloween costumes when my 10 y/o daughter stops in the adult aisle to ponder out loud, “Gosh, I’ve never seen a policewoman dressed like this before.”

    Twitter: @Dad_At_Law


    Leaving the kids' slime on the ceiling and calling it seasonal decor. Follow me for more housekeeping tips

    Twitter: @deloisivete


    This year for Halloween decorations I’m just using printouts of the school emails

    Twitter: @Chhapiness


    Parents, please check your kid's Halloween candy. Last year, my son found a ring in a Snickers bar and soon after left on a quest to save the world. We haven't seen him since.

    Twitter: @sofarrsogud


    “So lucky our kids have siblings so they’ll always be there for each other,” I mutter as I break up another physical fight between my daughters because they both want to be Hermione Granger for Halloween.

    Twitter: @Dad_At_Law


    Welp. They’re dead now. When does Shake Señora come on? -6, completely unphased by Beetlejuice

    Twitter: @michimama75


    Telling my kids they have nut allergies so I can have all their Reese’s.

    Twitter: @JayTorch1031


    bought my daughter an elsa dress at costco and the aftermath is so much glitter on the floor it looks like ke$ha was here

    Twitter: @EmSlyce


    I was going to wear a scary costume to take the kids trick or treating this year, but realized that going as a mom with 6 kids is terrifying enough.

    Twitter: @Six_Pack_Mom


    8-year-old: I've been thinking a lot. Me: About what? 8: What I'm going to do with all my Halloween candy.

    Twitter: @XplodingUnicorn

    If you think these parents are as hilarious as I do, be sure to follow them on Twitter!