18 Pregnancy Tweets That Are Way, Way Funnier Than They Should Be
"Husband: 'Why are you so tired?' Me: 'Because I'm assembling a person and there are a lot of little pieces!'"
1.
Me- *Coughs really hard. 3- Don't worry Mommy, I get you dry pants!
2.
My wife and I went for a walk and halfway through she got scared that we left the baby at the house. It’s still in her stomach. #PregnancyBrain
3.
I feel pissed off but I wanna cry, I want to be happy but I hate everyone, I want to talk to ppl but I don’t wanna be bothered. #pregnancyproblems
4.
When she says get hot fudge sundae pop tarts, you get hot fudge sundae pop tarts. #pregnancyadvice
5.
🎼 heartburn in the morning and in the afternoon, heartburn in the evening underneath the moon! 🎶 #pregnancyproblems
6.
My friend said ‘Having someone inside of you is so special’ and for a second there I had forgotten she is pregnant 😹
7.
I just read that pregnant women in stressful jobs/home situations are more likely to carry female fetuses to term because male fetuses are less likely to survive that stress and if that isn't nature's subtweet i don't know what is
8.
"Being pregnant and trying to play with a toddler is like being permanently hungover and trying to catch a honey badger."
9.
H- Why are you so tired? Me- I AM ASSEMBLING A PERSON AND THERE ARE A LOT OF LITTLE PIECES!!
10.
Even when I’m not thinking about food, I’m thinking about food. #sothisispregnancy #alwayshungry #WinterIsHere
11.
If you have an easy firstborn child, don't feel good about yourself. It's a trick from Mother Nature so you, fueled by false confidence, reproduce again. Your second will be a no-limit soldier who likes to slap and doesn't sleep.
12.
How the hell did @Beyonce sing while pregnant... I can’t even get a full sentence out without trying to catch my breath! #pregnancyproblems
13.
My latest #pregnancybrain adventure happened yday noon. Went to the bank to collect my car grant. Thought e/thing was fine until the bank called in the eve to tell me that.. I was not in their database of clients. Guys, I went to the WRONG BANK. My actual bank was just NEXT DOOR.
14.
You know you have #PregnantWifeProblems when your wife talks about food in ways she’s never talked about you...
15.
why am I wide awake at 3:37 am near tears thinking about the titanic?#thisispregnancy
16.
I am "gets winded putting my socks on" weeks pregnant.
17.
The next woman that tells me how much they loved being pregnant is getting throat punched. #pregnancysucks
18.
pregnancy, a synopsis: my Apple Watch told me to get up and move.. so I got up and moved my ass to the pantry for a snack #pregnancylife