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Why Listening To The Spice Girls Was Insanely Inappropriate

Warning: You may never see the Spice Girls the same way again.

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"2 Become 1"

Um, remember when you used to belt these lyrics out in front of your parents? That's right, you sang, "Are you as good as I remember, baby?" IN FRONT OF YOUR MOM!!!

"Naked"

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This song describes, IN DETAIL, the entire lifecycle of bedroom foreplay, which is perhaps not the best thing for children to be playing on repeat.

"Last Time Lover"

Pascal Le Segretain / Getty Images

"Last Time Lover" is all about having a one night stand, and goes on to gratuitously compare food to sex. So, in terms of childhood appropriateness, it's about a 0 out of 10.

"Too Much"

Getty Entertainment / Getty Images

There is a 90% chance this is about having an orgasm, which to borrow a phrase from the Spice Girls themselves, is just "too much" for me to handle.

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