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26 Things You Should NEVER Say To Your Boss

Talking with your boss can sometimes feel like navigating a minefield, but good manners should always be present in the workplace. Keep these quicks tip handy when speaking with your superiors and make sure to keep these "no no" phrases out of your vocabulary!

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1. fuck you boss

2. suck my dick boss

3. see you later in the parking lot boss, I'm going to kill you there

4. your mouth looks like a great place for my fist boss

5. I hate this job and you, the boss who gave it to me

6. when I take a shit I imagine the shit is you and when I flush it I give it double middle fingers

7. i got a gun in my bag

8. hello boss, it's me your employee, now prepare to die

9. you got elephant ears

10. when I drive to work I pray that a truck driver dozes off and rear ends me, sending the headrest of my carseat directly into the back of my neck, paralyzing me instantly. Then I won't have to come work for you, the boss I hate

11. drink your coffee boss, I put a bunch of poison in it

12. Is it ok if this project waits until Tuesday, my daughter has a soccer game

13. [when your boss walks in the office] Is the circus in town? Because it seems that a clown ass bitch has just walked into the office. I'm talking about you boss

14. Good morning boss, please kill yourself

15. prepare to be destroyed

16. I'll be in your office around 2:00 PM to karate chop the shit out of you, see you later boss

17. i left a bomb in your car

18. i have broken the law and paid an assassin $40,000 to perform the illegal crime of murdering you boss

19. [while aiming a bazooka at your boss] goodbye

20. Can I leave early

21. theres a bear loose in your office and he’s got one of your kids boss

22. i would love to push you into the grand canyon fool

23. [holding a sword] say your prayers ho

24. give me $1 million dollars or I’ll drive my car right into your office, obliterating you completely

25. hey boss, I'm buying a butterfly knife online and when it arrives through the fedex courier company I’ll be using it to kill you

26. At my last job we did it this way

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