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There Was Once An Epic Battle Between Rappers And Superheroes

"What if I had the power to gather all of my favorite emcees/With the illest comic book characters and they became arch enemies? / Inconceivable? Unbelievable? Yet as wild as it seems, The Emperor and Stan Lee would coach the two opposing teams..."

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This is Last Emperor

He's created some pretty ill rhymes
Via last.fm

He's created some pretty ill rhymes

This is Stan Lee

He's created some pretty ill comics
Via wired.com

He's created some pretty ill comics

So what would happen if there was some random ass beef between some of the biggest names in both Hip Hop and comics? Last Emperor (and most of us for that matter) wanted to find out so he penned the 1998 classic "Secret Wars" and we got some interesting match ups. Let's take a look

*Full Disclosure: There was a "Secret Wars Part II" but, like with most sequels, that shit was kinda wack so lets just act like it never happened.

w.soundcloud.com / Via soundcloud.com

1. KRS One vs Professor X

"Set it off! It's the fight of the century / KRS and Professor X will battle each other mentally / with rhymes, these two team captains waste no time / Charles Xavier tried to invade Chris Parker's mind / He shot a cerebral probe at Chris' mind but he missed it / Professor X taken out by the Blast Master's metaphysics"
Via themalaysianinsider.com

"Set it off! It's the fight of the century / KRS and Professor X will battle each other mentally / with rhymes, these two team captains waste no time / Charles Xavier tried to invade Chris Parker's mind / He shot a cerebral probe at Chris' mind but he missed it / Professor X taken out by the Blast Master's metaphysics"

2. GZA vs Dr Strange

"Round two, new fight, word to life you gotta see this / locked in mortal combat is Dr Strange and The Genius / 'Yeah son he's no match, let that grafted wizard have it' / 'My Liquid Swords slashes straight through Dr Strange's magic' / Another Hero down and now the score is two to zero / by 'Words from the Genius' and he's still my rhyming hero"
Via ziymcl.pixnet.net

"Round two, new fight, word to life you gotta see this / locked in mortal combat is Dr Strange and The Genius / 'Yeah son he's no match, let that grafted wizard have it' / 'My Liquid Swords slashes straight through Dr Strange's magic' / Another Hero down and now the score is two to zero / by 'Words from the Genius' and he's still my rhyming hero"

3. Redman vs The Hulk

"Now the next fight was conducted in a rough-like manner / specifically between Reggie Noble and Dr. David Banner / or should I say The Incredible Hulk when he's amped off of gamma / but Reggie Noble soon became The Incredible Redman and slammed him / you know how Redman gets when his adrenaline starts pumping / starting schitzing in the ring so then The Thing tried to jump in / Ben Grimm leaps into the ring and after Redman he lunges / 'But Reggie Noble dropped him with two Brick City punches!'"
Via aintitcool.com

"Now the next fight was conducted in a rough-like manner / specifically between Reggie Noble and Dr. David Banner / or should I say The Incredible Hulk when he's amped off of gamma / but Reggie Noble soon became The Incredible Redman and slammed him / you know how Redman gets when his adrenaline starts pumping / starting schitzing in the ring so then The Thing tried to jump in / Ben Grimm leaps into the ring and after Redman he lunges / 'But Reggie Noble dropped him with two Brick City punches!'"

There Was Even Guest Commentary By Common (formerly known as Common Sense)

"While the refs clean out the ring because the last fight was so intense / let's do live interview with my brother named Common Sense / 'Yeah, yeah it's Common Sense and Iceman tried to freeze me / so I took him to Chicago and told him to take it easy / he couldn't see me with my apple jack hat and high tops / Colossus and Cyclops? I got No I.D. and Y-not"
Via blogs.villagevoice.com

"While the refs clean out the ring because the last fight was so intense / let's do live interview with my brother named Common Sense / 'Yeah, yeah it's Common Sense and Iceman tried to freeze me / so I took him to Chicago and told him to take it easy / he couldn't see me with my apple jack hat and high tops / Colossus and Cyclops? I got No I.D. and Y-not"

4. Busta Rhymes vs Dr Octopus

"Now the next fight had to be the craziest of all times / we got Dr. Octopus verses the mighty Busta Rhymes / Doc Oc verses Busta? Man that stuff is dead / he'd get his eight arms ripped off going up against the dread / 'Ha ha, now Dr. Octopus, who you think you're grabbing? The God could never lose so you know it will never happen / lyrically making me sleepy, you'll need a nap when / I smack you with my dreads, lights out, you'll kiss the canvas'"
Via comicvine.com

"Now the next fight had to be the craziest of all times / we got Dr. Octopus verses the mighty Busta Rhymes / Doc Oc verses Busta? Man that stuff is dead / he'd get his eight arms ripped off going up against the dread / 'Ha ha, now Dr. Octopus, who you think you're grabbing? The God could never lose so you know it will never happen / lyrically making me sleepy, you'll need a nap when / I smack you with my dreads, lights out, you'll kiss the canvas'"

5. Ras Kass vs Magneto

"Before my eyes I see the demise of another Superhero / next up is Ras Kass verses Magneto / Now anything goes when Magneto battles foes / but Ras Kass had shivering, delivering ultra-magnetic blows / Magneto is now deceased and a wise man said it best / 'The sun rises in the East but they can still set it in the West'"
Via marvel.com

"Before my eyes I see the demise of another Superhero / next up is Ras Kass verses Magneto / Now anything goes when Magneto battles foes / but Ras Kass had shivering, delivering ultra-magnetic blows / Magneto is now deceased and a wise man said it best / 'The sun rises in the East but they can still set it in the West'"

6. Lauryn Hill vs Storm

"Now with all these Heroes down Stan Lee refuses to surrender / He got Storm from the X Men as if I couldn't match the gender / Stan Lee shouts 'Excelsior!' / Yo Stan you better chill / 'There's no match for Storm' / I guess he's never heard of Lauryn Hill / Now we all know Storm controls the temperature and weather / started running off at the lip and L Boog was like 'whatever' / See she just got home from touring, she's a bit too tired to spar / so she clocked Storm over the head with my man Wyclef's guitar"
Via fightersgeneration.com

"Now with all these Heroes down Stan Lee refuses to surrender / He got Storm from the X Men as if I couldn't match the gender / Stan Lee shouts 'Excelsior!' / Yo Stan you better chill / 'There's no match for Storm' / I guess he's never heard of Lauryn Hill / Now we all know Storm controls the temperature and weather / started running off at the lip and L Boog was like 'whatever' / See she just got home from touring, she's a bit too tired to spar / so she clocked Storm over the head with my man Wyclef's guitar"

7. Jeru the Damaja vs The Beast

Via last.fm
"All silence is ceased, out of nowhere comes The Beast / verses Jeru the Damaja, the black prophet from the East / Releasing rhymes that will pound you into the ground, there'll be no round two / another victory for Hip Hop by the Dirty Rotten Scoundrel"
Via hometheatermack.com

"All silence is ceased, out of nowhere comes The Beast / verses Jeru the Damaja, the black prophet from the East / Releasing rhymes that will pound you into the ground, there'll be no round two / another victory for Hip Hop by the Dirty Rotten Scoundrel"

8. Das Efx vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

"Now the underground sewer system that lies deep below the ring / is where the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Das Efx do their thing / Leonard and Donatello, they will know that we can do this / 'So kriggidy Krazy Drayzy hit 'em both with raw sewege' / Now Raphael and Michelangelo, those two other sewer brothers / Books smacked 'em with the Das Efx logo, a manhole cover / whether you're plant or animal,vegetable or miggidy mineral / before you step to Das Efx you best be hard like a criminal"
Via comicsonline.com

"Now the underground sewer system that lies deep below the ring / is where the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Das Efx do their thing / Leonard and Donatello, they will know that we can do this / 'So kriggidy Krazy Drayzy hit 'em both with raw sewege' / Now Raphael and Michelangelo, those two other sewer brothers / Books smacked 'em with the Das Efx logo, a manhole cover / whether you're plant or animal,vegetable or miggidy mineral / before you step to Das Efx you best be hard like a criminal"

9. Boot Camp Clik vs G.I. Joe / Cobra

Via lastfm.es
"Taking you back to ringside just when you thought it was over / the last battle was brought forth by G.I. Joe and Cobra / Mercenaries and soldiers, G.I. Joe is rolling thick / but I'll get the military of Hip Hop aka The Boot Camp Clik / World War Three in ninety-eight in the wake of all these troops / I can see General Buckshot going toe to toe with Duke / Salute the captain for rapping because now we know who's hard / catching wreck like Steele and Tek up against the Crimson Guard / charging after you, smashing you / metaphorically bashing through the entire Joe team is O.G.C. and Ruck the Irrational / when all of a sudden I hear this real loud CRACK / 'The Military Punisher Big Rock just broke Roadblock's back'"
Via hugozapata.com.ar

"Taking you back to ringside just when you thought it was over / the last battle was brought forth by G.I. Joe and Cobra / Mercenaries and soldiers, G.I. Joe is rolling thick / but I'll get the military of Hip Hop aka The Boot Camp Clik / World War Three in ninety-eight in the wake of all these troops / I can see General Buckshot going toe to toe with Duke / Salute the captain for rapping because now we know who's hard / catching wreck like Steele and Tek up against the Crimson Guard / charging after you, smashing you / metaphorically bashing through the entire Joe team is O.G.C. and Ruck the Irrational / when all of a sudden I hear this real loud CRACK / 'The Military Punisher Big Rock just broke Roadblock's back'"

10. Method Man vs Wolverine

"To add insult to injury to Stan Lee and his team / he got Weapon X from Canada aka Wolverine / You know the routine, his claws can rip rappers for days / but here comes the Method Man aka Johnny Blaze / 'Wolverine you can't hang when Tical does his thang / paralyze you with the venom from the Method Man's fangs'"
Via smscs.com

"To add insult to injury to Stan Lee and his team / he got Weapon X from Canada aka Wolverine / You know the routine, his claws can rip rappers for days / but here comes the Method Man aka Johnny Blaze / 'Wolverine you can't hang when Tical does his thang / paralyze you with the venom from the Method Man's fangs'"

11. Nas vs Spiderman

"This is the final battle as the stratosphere gets darker / We got Nasir Jones verses Peter Parker / Nasty Nas, the halftime head-ringer verses the web-slinger / Illmatic verses radioactive in the Rotten Apple where the dead linger / He cursed the day that spider ever bit him / then gave him a copy of the second LP 'It was Written'"
Via comicvine.com

"This is the final battle as the stratosphere gets darker / We got Nasir Jones verses Peter Parker / Nasty Nas, the halftime head-ringer verses the web-slinger / Illmatic verses radioactive in the Rotten Apple where the dead linger / He cursed the day that spider ever bit him / then gave him a copy of the second LP 'It was Written'"

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