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September 18, 2012

Mrs. Jesus Christ

A historian of early Christianity at Harvard Divinity School has identified a scrap of papyrus that she says was written in Coptic in the fourth century and contains a phrase never seen in any piece of Scripture: "Jesus said to them, 'My wife ...'"

Susan Sarandon: I'm Very Happy For Romney's Gaffe

"I'm very happy that he's just so entertaining." —Susan Sarandon

Obama Zings Romney's 47% Remark

"If you want to be president, you gotta work for everybody, not just for some," says President Obama on Letterman.

The 21 Most Terrifying Things As A Kid

They haunted your dreams when you were six, and now they're BACK FOR MORE.

Some Thoughts About XOXO

I attended the XOXO Festival in Portland, OR this past weekend. I don't have a great deal to say about it because -- and I'm not trying to be a dick here -- you had to be there. As in, physically in the room with the speakers and the attendees. But …

Door To Door For Obama In The Wild West

Nevada is a swing state; California is blue. During the presidential elections it's a regular thing for Californians to go to Nevada to campaign on behalf of their chosen candidate. I spent six hours on Saturday knocking on doors in a subdivision in…

Battle Of The Sexes: Are You Better At Recognizing Owls Or Cars?

A new study shows gender may influence how good we are at recognizing certain objects. Test your own recognition skills below.

Abe Lincoln Doppelgänger Sweating Skittles

While running on a treadmill, wearing a wife-beater. He falls, and slams his head against the wall.

Congresswoman Advertises Success In Renaming Post Office

Rep. Bono Mack's ad is called "Effective."

NASCAR Driver Touches Competitor's Wife's Ass, Doesn't Think It's Weird

Calm down, guys. DeLana's ass is just a good luck charm.

Cave Paintings Were Stone Age Animations

Archaeologist Marc Azéma thinks that Stone Age artists may have fashioned their cave paintings in such a way as to suggest movement, crude movies that came to life as the flickering light from a fire danced on the walls.

The Terrible 20: Ways To Blow A Facebook Fortune @

The latest viral buzz from

11 Classic Kids Books From The '60s

All the books that lined the back of your fifth grade classroom.

Romney's 47%: Are You In It?

The people who don't pay federal income tax will surprise you.

Philosopher Descartes's Sage Internet Advice

Don't let Cyber Bullies get you down. Also, leave yourself a little mystery in this age of social media.

How To Hack Your Twitter Header Art

Websites unrolling new features is always a super stressful event, and Twitter's mimicking of Facebook's cover pages is no different. But if you have a few hours to spare, you can make it totally fun! Add yours in the comments.

Brian Wilson's Bizarre Commute To Work

Unless you're a magician who specializes in tricks ILLUSIONS that are accompanied by the band Europe's music, you should never look like this on the way to work.

Tony Hawk Skates Through The Halls Of SiriusXM

This seems like a fun day at work. "I remember it well. I said, 'hey Jerry what's going on today- Watch out Tony Hawk's going to run over you!' and that's how Jerry died."

How To "Verify" Your Twitter Account In Like 12 Seconds

Like trolling your friends? Strangers? Then you'll love Twitter's new header design. (via @fromedome.)

The Greatest Hits Of Barack Obama's Liberal 1990s

The Romney campaign is dwelling on a video on the Drudge Report today in which Obama praises redistribution. He was pretty openly liberal back then.

Romney Said He'd Take Advantage Of Iran Hostage-Like "Opportunity" [UPDATED]

The secret video that keeps on giving. A foreign policy exchange before the campaign turned to foreign policy.

So You Wanna Be The DJ For A Nu Metal Band

Every good nu metal band needs a DJ to randomly scratch a record for no reason during the verses of their songs.

R.I.P. Britney And Justin

The world's most amazing pop star couple — Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake — just called it quits. Herewith, a tribute. :(

Y2K? More Like Y2LAME

It's January 1, 2000 and you survived Y2K.

Are You Watching This Reality Singing Show, 'American Idol'?

Heard it's okay. You should check it out.

Arnold Schwarzenegger's Newest Role: Governator Of California

The Austrian action star is now the most powerful man in the our most populated state.

Hot Fashion Trend: Fedoras!

The look that Frank Sinatra popularized decades ago is back — for both men and women! Check out some of the celebs that rock the look.

10 Things "Juno" Taught Us About Teen Pregnancy

Diablo Cody's new movie is all about teen pregnancy and quotes to put in your Facebook profile.

The Definitive Britney Spears Wedding(s) Photo Album

A retrospective look at all the "Toxic" singer's weddings.

11 Pager Codes That You Need To Know

Just convinced your dad to get you a pager and not quite sure what to do with the 75 free pages a month that are included in your plan? You'll need to learn these pager codes before your friends make fun of you for not knowing what they mean.

22 Best Moments From The First-Ever Episode Of The Real World

"This is the true story... of seven strangers... picked to live in a together and have their lives taped... to find out what happens... when people stop being polite... and start getting real."

Why "Beverly Hills, 90210" Is The Epitome Of Fashion

All the style inspiration you would ever need can be be found Wednesday nights at 8pm on your TV!

11 Failed TV Shows That Aired Between "Friends" And "Seinfeld"

The 8:30pm on NBC's Thursdays, sandwiched between Friends and Seinfeld is revolving door of failed shows. Here are some of it's casualties.

Furbish-To-English Translation Guide

So that you too can begin to understand the nonsensical chirps of the hot new toy sweeping the nation. They start to learn English pretty quickly, but they never stop being kinda menacing.

Will Titanic Sink Or Swim?

This winter's big budget film has gotten a lot of bad press, but can it bring in big audiences?

What's On Your Winamp Playlist?

Fill your feed with recent hits for every situation.

10 Things You Don't Know About "Waterworld"

Did you guys see this movie!? Okay, so it ONLY came out last week, but here are some fun facts about it.

17 Bitching Slammers To Make Your Friends Jealous

You'll thank us when you overtake the kid with a laser pointer as king of the playground.

Why "Sabrina The Teenage Witch" Is The Best Show On TGIF

This is my favorite show to watch every Friday night while I eat ice cream in my footsie pajamas.

A Bookstore On The "World Wide Web?"

It's named after a river in South America. Its founder is a banker who missed the dotcom bubble. We give it six months tops.

Just A Normal Picture Of The Cast Of "Community"

Nothing to see here, move along.

"Harry Potter" Is Turning Our Kids Into Devil-Worshipping Satanists

First stop, Harry Potter. Next stop, the fiery pits of hell.

Beanie Baby Investors Guide

Forget stocks, bonds and gold. Invest in Beanie Babies.

We Love Saturday Morning Cartoons

They're the best part about Saturday mornings!

Nintendo's Home Entertainment System Will Blow Your Mind


The 12 Best Chick Flicks To Rent From Your Local Video Store

Stuck at home on a Friday night without a date?

Why Morrissey Is The Best Member Of The Smiths

I <3 The Moz and I don't care who knows it!

11 Other Things You Can Do With The Power Glove

The Power Glove is so bad. I love it. But did you know that it isn't just for controlling video games really, really well?

Doesn't Bill Cosby Have The Best Sweaters?

The Cosby Show should probably win an Emmy award in costume design, too.

How To Play The Keytar

It's the sickest new instrument, so of course you're wondering how to incorporate it into your band. Let me help.

Inspirational Style Icon: Madonna

This "Material Girl" has a unique sense of style that has influenced an entire generation. Here are some of her best looks.

"We Are The World" Is Like The Biggest Song Ever

The charity single written by Michael Jackson and Lionel Richie tops the charts for a month and sells a lot of copies.

Introducing "Japanimation"

This new style of cartoons from Japan is a little different than Rocky & Bullwinkle or Loony Toons. Here's a selection of some of the "animes" out there.

Oprah Winfrey Rolls Out A Wagon Of Fat

It represents the 67 pounds she's lost since she started her diet. Get it, girl!

Big Hair Ads

Go big, or go home and tease it and make it bigger. No faux-metal hair band photos here, because that's too easy.

Jesse Ventura Considers Presidential Run — With Howard Stern

Ventura/Stern 2016. Meanwhile, "Manhattan Madam" Kristin Davis is running for New York City Mayor.

Hanson Covers Taylor Swift

I have so many feelings right now.

Kat Von D And Deadmau5 Are Dating Now

Feels kind of like an unholy union, no? That story and more in today's CelebFeed Gossip Roundup.

Romney Defends Leaked Comments, Hits Obama For 1998 "Redistribution" Line

On Fox News Tuesday, the Republican presidential nominee hit the president for a recently uncovered clip in which he says he "actually likes redistribution." Romney also defended his comments about 47% of Americans who he says will vote for Obama.

11 Movie Stars From The 70s Enjoying Great Senior Citizen Careers

Alternate title: Look At Your Favorite Older Celebs Without Wrinkles.

Inside The Dark World Of Online Sugar Daddies

I signed up for a site that sets up escorts with men who want to pay them — handsomely — for sex and company. After meeting a slew of men, I learned they often have to hustle harder than the women.

Breath-Taking Cathedral Ceilings And Other Links

A time when form and function peacefully coexisted. Also, celebrities that doubled as spies and the best closing lyrics in music.

Bernese Mountain Dog Puppy Vs. Lemon

Because there's nothing cuter than baby animals freaking out about citrus fruits.

Clint Eastwood Is A Libertarian

Libertarian= minimum government, maximum freedom and lots of invisible humans in chairs.

27 New Rules For Dressing From London

London Fashion Week is known for being wacky in the most awesome way. Let's see what tips those Brits have for dressing next spring.

Financier Eased Obama Aide's Path From Government

Former body man Reggie Love got financial assistance from Orin Kramer. Obama's "little brother."

Joseph Gordon-Levitt In Flaunt Magazine

Oh hey, JGL. Lookin' good.

Kawaii-fied Celebs: Adorable or Terrifying?

See how far you can make it before your eyes start bleeding. Special thanks to our new favorite tumblr The Kawaii Project.

Bring It On: Old School Cheerleaders

Cheerleaders' skirts used to be a lot longer. Doesn't mean they didn't bring it just as hard back then as they do today.

Denzel Washington Debuts New Hair On The Cover Of GQ

Fab or drab? I think it's pretty suave-looking, actually.

New Couple Alert: Kat Von D's New Beau Can't Keep Quiet On Patty's Blog

It's no secret that our girl Kat Von D hasn't had the best luck in the love department. The 30-year-old celeb tattoo artist had a very public and messy break-up with notorious cheater Jesse James in 2011 and her fling with rapper Scroobius Pip in Ju…

A Tribute To Greta Garbo Not Being Impressed

Greta Garbo would have celebrated her 107th birthday this week. She wouldn't have been impressed.

This Week In Dumb Homophobes: Yunel Escobar's Gay Slur Face Paint

There’s no point in getting all maudlin and preachy about this, but it should be shown to as many people as possible: Toronto Blue Jays shortstop Yunel Escobar showed up to Saturday’s game against the Boston Red Sox with “you are a faggot” written o…

Leaked Romney Video Makes Local Front Pages

The 47% comment leaks into print.

Jennifer Aniston Laughs Off Tabloid Rumors In New SmartWater Ad

She even wears a fake pregnant belly. We get it, nobody knows when, where, or IF you're going to create little Theroux's.

Aaron Paul Is Very Confused By Burberry

The clothes...they walk?

Former Santorum Staffer Acccused Of Sexual Misconduct At The Citadel

According to an internal email, the suspect in a groping case at the school is a former advance man for the Santorum campaign and did work for the Romney campaign.

Royals Gone Wild: See Kate Middleton Dancing In A Grass Skirt

On the tiny Pacific island of Tuvalu. Prince William eventually joined in, thereby fully exploring (and exploiting) his awkwardness.

Your Guide To The Champions League Group Stages

The best tournament in sports is back in business.

Exclusive: Moms Nearly Six Times As Likely As Dads To Be Called "Bad" Online

Data analysts tracked which adjectives are most closely associated with mothers and fathers. For moms — but not dads — "bad" and "naked" made the top ten.

How To Write A Good Online Dating Profile

There are enough terrible internet dating profiles out there. Here's how to write one that won't send potential partners running to the closest cat video.

Meet Uganda's New 19-Year-Old Parliament Member

It's "not age" that matters, but rather "the brain and the knowledge that one has," she says.

Delorean Makes Return Trip To Iconic 'Back To The Future' Houses

The film's stylish time machine makes its way back to Marty McFly's stomping grounds.

New York's "Summer Of The Gun" Wasn't

New York City had the fewest shooting incidents of any summer since '04. So much for what tabloids cast as the 'summer of blood.'

Woman Breaks Down At Paul Ryan Event

She says elites in Massachusetts won't talk to you if your dad is an auto mechanic.

"Malcolm In The Middle" Cast Reunited

Frankie Muniz says this is the first time they were together in over 6 years. Look at Dewey!

Baseball Player Writes "You Are A Faggot" On His Eye Black

Toronto's Yunel Escobar has a strange way of getting himself hyped up for games. UPDATE!

On Bruce Springsteen And Disappointing Fathers

Darkness on the Edge of Town taught me to understand my dad long after we stopped speaking.

Dog Horses Are Disconcerting, Not Cute, Internet

Why is this a thing? Anyone know? Anyone?

Say Hello To Dwarf Baby Mongooses

Mongooses? Mongeese? Whatever, JUST LOOK AT THEM! A trio of these adorable guys were born to proud parents Elmo and Elvina at the Edinburgh Zoo.

31 Boy Bands That You Probably Forgot Ever Existed

I'm not talking about N Sync, the Backstreet Boys, or even 98 Degrees.

Olympic Gold Medalist Ryan Lochte Responded To SNL's Parody Of Him

Ryan Lochte told reporters at the ALMA Awards that he didn't think Seth MacFarlane's impression of him on Saturday Night Live was accurate.

Kate Middleton And Prince William Got Their Groove On

The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge visited the Polynesian island of Tuvalu where they danced in traditional garb. And provided us with many a' .gif.

Jay Carney Critiqued Obama For "Bitter Clinger" Comments In 2008: "A Huge Weakness"

As a reporter in 2008, the now White House press secretary said Obama's comments about small town Pennsylvanians exposed a huge weakness of then Senator Obama's.

Jon Hamm's Butt: A Collection Of Photos

A week after he showed the world his Jon Hamm, he's putting his behind on display. Those pics and a slightly-creepy-yet-fond look back at his butt.

33 Meticulous Cleaning Tricks For The OCD Person Inside You

And if you don't follow these rules, your world will probably fall apart. Just kidding! But OCD or not, you can probably stand to get a little more thorough with your cleaning, while saving time in the long run.

Jerk Reporter Makes Toddler Cry

Just you wait, Dan Daru. In 15 years, this kid is coming for you.

How Fox And Friends Covered The Leaked Romney Video

An emphasis on putting Romney's comments in context.

World Record For Most "Star Wars" Costume Changes In A Music Video

Hot guy singing while stripping for Star Wars? Sold.

8 Select Quotes From Dina Lohan's Bizarre Interview With Dr. Phil

Lots of people think she was drunk for this. Do you?

How Kanye West Parties

Grool. I meant to say cool and then I started to say great.

Justin Bieber And One Direction As 80-Year-Olds

Welcome to the future! By the way, these were done by a forensic artist, so it's science.

Meet Spangles, Your New Favorite Cross-Eyed Cat

Cat? Check. Endearing disfigurement? Check. Pirate outfit? Check. And what's more, Spangles was born on the Fourth of July. He's a true patriot. And here's why you should salute him. (h/t Bobby)

12 People Mentioned In Kanye's New Album

Kanye West and the rest of the GOOD crew do plenty of name dropping on the collaborative Cruel Summer album.

7 Perfect Lunchtime Soups For Fall

Goodbye brown bag, hello Thermos, you wildly under-used thing, you. Instead packing cold sandwiches for lunch, plan ahead a bit more and try making some of these hot soups.

25 Years Of Storage

Another reason why we should all be happy it isn’t 1996 anymore.

Casual Racism From A German Tanning Salon Poster

Being "pale at Oktoberfest is like..."

Aubrey Plaza Rollerblading Like A Pro

She's on the set of Parks and Rec with the rest of the cast and Amy Poehler looks really happy. Aziz, not so much.

Face Off: Beatles Fangirls Vs. Directioners

Which British band has the craziest fans of all time? You decide.

Dallas Cowboys Fan Loses His Mind After Loss

"Dez Bryant, If you don't get your shit straight you gonna find your ass in Cleveland."

Terrifying Rural Chinese Commute Tops The Morning Links

Nope nope nope. Plus the bare midriff is back and dumb bets that changed everything.

Bill Nye Partying In The '80s

Every kid's dream: to party with Bill Nye.

More Than $68,000 Raised For Widow And Children Of Slain Government Worker

Sean Smith, a well-known gamer, died in the attacks on the U.S. compound in Benghazi. Now the internet is helping build his kids' college funds.

Cassette To iPhone Converter

No idea why this exists, but I really want it anyway.

Mr. Belding From "Saved By The Bell" Is A Wrestler Now

He's kicking ass AC Slater style.

One Of The Avengers Just Became POTUS

Not bad for a recently dead guy. Does this technically make him our first zombie President? Let's just say yes. (Spoilers Inside Obviously)

4 Mashups That Prove Taylor Swift And Kanye West Need To Record Together

Two artists, separated by controversy, yet perfect for each other musically. Please collaborate Taylor Swift and Kanye West! And make the perfect pop song!

Megan Mullally Performs With Her Band On "Conan"

Stephanie Hunt and Mullally perform as Nancy & Beth and I have to hand it to them: their performance last night on Conan was the kick-your-shoes-off-and-dance kind of entertaining.

Just What You Need For Fall: Leather Track Pants

This is somehow a trend. Would you say it's chic or bleak?

Calexico (The Band) Meets Calexico (The Taco Truck)

The alt-country band discover that their music goes really well with tacos.

"Slightly Used" Frisbee For Sale

In these trying economic times, all of us have to sacrifice... It's only $16.50!

Mindy Kaling Is Marge Simpson

For Glamour magazine.

Shaun White Arrested For Embarrassing Himself At A Nashville Hotel

He apparently pulled the fire alarm, broke a hotel phone and tried to attack another guest, but fell on his head before he could throw the first punch.

TwitPic Theater: Playmates Ditch Their Shirts!

Playmates don’t need a lot of coverage when they’re out on the town. Breaking news? Maybe not. But it’s def welcome news.

"Most Interesting Man In The World" Endorses Obama

The actor, Jonathan Goldsmith, is hosting a fundraiser for the President tonight in Burlington, VT.

Quiz: Can You Guess The Prices From This 1996 Best Buy Flyer?

Test your mid-90s electronic price knowledge. Thank God it isn't 1996 anymore.

French Publisher Has 24 Hours To Turn Over Topless Kate Middleton Photos

If the company doesn't act within the timeframe, it will be fined $13,100 daily. Nobody told French courts about "the internet."

Romney's Secret Video Could Be A Game Changer

Jennifer Granholm comments on the audio secretly recorded at a Romney closed door event, telling wealthy donors that the majority of President Obama’s supporters just want government handouts.

POLL: What Would You Do With Your Own "Holodeck" @

The latest viral buzz from

Why Politicians Say Dumb Things To Rich People

Big donors pay five figures or more for chummy presentations and fake influence. They got what they paid for in Florida.

The Long Strange Leak Of Mitt Romney's 47% Video

How the media works now. Huffington Post won the race; Mother Jones got the full video.

Romney's Disdain For #47percent Of America Proves 'He's All About The Rich'

New videos secretly shot at campaign fundraisers and unearthed by Mother Jones magazine reveal exactly what Mitt Romney says when the little people are out of the room. Cenk says, “He views 47 percent of the country as lazy people who don’t deserve …

When Candidate Obama Was Caught On Tape

The most obvious parallel to Mitt Romney's secretly-recorded comments at a Florida fundraiser, roiling the campaign today, were Barack Obama's suggestion that "bitter" voters were "clinging" to their guns. Here's how he tried to clean that up.

Anime Vs. Video Games From

The brightest Japan-bred games enjoyed international appeal, while the anime industry kept a much lower profile in North America and Europe. Officially released anime titles were still expensive and obscure in the U.S., and getting a steady supply …

Romney's 47% Clean-Up

In a hastily-called press conference in California this evening, Romney said that controversial remarks weren't elegant, but they reflect his view.

Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson In 49ers Locker Room After Detroit Game

Harbaugh introduces Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson to 49ers locker room after Detroit game. Vaughn/Wilson congratulate 49ers while shooting Internship.

Meet The Real — Conservative — Mitt Romney

Leaked videos show the candidate saying what he thinks. Deeply conservative economic policies, and a deep dislike for Barack Obama.

Kwon Soon Keun Steals The Show

Normally, I'm fairly conversant on crazy Korean drummers, so I have no idea how I missed the boat on Kwon Soon Keun. Keun is the subject of A Drummer's Passion, a movie about his life and wild playing style. This was the first video of Keun's playin…

Vanishing Arctic Ice Is The Planet's White Flag Of Surrender // Current TV

We're a TV network available on DirecTV, Comcast, Time Warner Cable, Dish Network, and more. Find us on your TV. While you are here you can watch videos from our TV shows, check our TV schedule, and participate in discussions with members of our c…

Innocence Of Muslims Actress's Open Letter Describes Her Experience

I don’t have the space to get into a discussion of whether the wave of violent protests spreading across the Middle East (today to Afghanistan and Indonesia) was really “caused” by Nakoula B. Nakoula‘s (aka Sam Bacile) anti-Islamic film, “Innocence …

The Only Thing You Need To Know About Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2

This .gif from the Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 2 trailer says more about the Twilight franchise than all of the previous movies combined. |via PeterBerkman|

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