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July 17, 2012

The Essential 100, No. 93: Cave Story From

Yet Cave Story is, to be frank, a much stronger game than its '80s-era inspirations. Unlike adventures such as Zelda II, Metroid, or Maze of Galious, nothing about Pixel's creation comes across as needlessly opaque. Its secrets exist to intrigue and…

The Essential 100, No. 95: Jet Grind Radio From

ne look at the borderline-racist commercial for Jet Grind Radio, and you can tell Sega had absolutely no idea how to sell this game to an American audience. Anxious to grab onto something -- anything -- the company sunk its advertising claws directl…

Rotten Tomatoes Bans Eric Snider Over Dark Knight Troll Prank

Enter Eric Snider from, who thought it’d be funny to post a fake review snippet, saying “The Dark Knight Rises is easily the most disappointing Batman film so far – and I’m including Schumacher’s Batman & Robin in that statement.” It was a …

Weightlifter Sarah Robles's Journey To The Olympics Is Looking Up

Robles's story of fighting poverty and body-image issues on her way to the London games has resonated with thousands of people since appearing in Time magazine and on BuzzFeed Shift. Thanks to their help, she's raised a bundle of money and accrued a legion of supporters rallying to get her sponsorships, magazine covers, and more. Here's a full update on what's new with her career.

Vivus Weight-Loss Pill Approved -- Maybe?

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. (TheStreet) -- U.S. regulators have apparently approved Vivus'(VVUS) weight-loss pill Qsymia on Tuesday, which means obese Americans now have a choice in prescription diet pills.

I'm Moving My New Home Wish List Photo

I finally found a place I wanna move to. It's a really special, one of a kind space that has a lot of history and a lot of nature around it. I'm excited to build my dream home out of it and made a little wish list/gallery of all the stuff I wanna ge…

Only In Florida: Man Stabbed Over Pork Rinds

Being a lifelong resident of Florida, I’ve grown immune to the jokes that my UPROXXian colleagues make at my expense, but I’m also the first to admit that this state will eventually lead to the opening of several portals to hell. That said, today’s …

Explain This Photo And Other Links

My best guess is a real life adaptation of The Emperor's New Groove. Also, terrifying ways your brain can betray you and working My Little Pony firearms.

Hair Dryer Circa The 1920s

Or, a hair dryer as imagined by Dr. Seuss. You know how we laugh at old computers from the 70s for being comically large? Yeah, exactly like that.

Tavi Gevinson Thinks "Seventeen" Magazine's Headlines Are Just As Bad As Its Photoshopped Models

The 16-year-old Rookie editor applauds the girls behind the Seventeen Photoshop petition, but thinks that the magazine's body-shaming goes beyond its images: "The effects of headlines under the 'health' section about your back-to-school body are still there. It took me a little bit once middle school started to realize that if I didn't read Seventeen, I didn't feel obligated to watch what I eat. Language is powerful, along with photos."

Michael Clarke Duncan Still Sedated After Heart Attack

LOS ANGELES, July 17 (UPI) -- Actor Michael Clarke Duncan has been on a ventilator and sedated since he was hospitalized after a heart attack in Los Angeles last week, TMZ reported.

Why A Legendary Gadget Needs To Die

If there is such a thing as a router of myth, the Linksys WRT54G is it. But it's time for the geek community's nostalgia to stop clouding the fact no one should buy it anymore.

Romney's "Braveheart" Strategy

Sununu Day continues with the former New Hampshire governor likening the Romney campaign's "discipline" strategy to Mel Gibson's "Braveheart" film. Sununu adds that he'd never hire any of the Romney supporters who want to the Republican nominee start "real engagement" as soon as possible.

Here Are All Of Mitt Romney's Personal Financial Disclosure Filings From 2001-2005

The forms, filed with the Massachusetts State Ethics Commission during Romney's run and tenure as Governor, show various Romney investments in Bain Capital funds and membership of boards until 2003. After 2003 time all of Romney's assets became listed in a blind trust. While the years 2001,2002 are 27 pages long each, after 2003 the forms are just seven to ten pages long.

The 8 Best Ways To Use Blueberries This Season

If you don't devour your blueberries before you get them home from the market (or the field — if you picked them, more power to you), you should definitely try cooking them in one of these dishes. In fact, just stock up, and start cooking — now.

Romney Backer: Obama Is An Un-American Pot-Smoker

The former New Hampshire governor and Romney supporter also told Fox News that the president has no idea how the "American system" functions because he, "spent his early years in Hawaii smoking something."

"Sherlock Holmes" And "Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea" Reimagined As Gay Love Stories

Thanks to the astounding popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey's witless eroticism, Total-E-Books will publish a series of classic novels with the addition of new sex scenes. The series of ebooks called Clandestine Classics includes tales of Sherlock and Watson's gay love affair; Jane Eyre's sexual submissiveness; and Mr. Darcy's naughty attempts to screw Elizabeth Bennett in the meadow. Here are some excerpts.

Remember When Jennifer Lawrence Was On A Sitcom?

It's okay if you don't, it didn't last long. But these are the amazing promo photos for The Bill Engvall Show, where Jennifer played the "scheming teenage daughter." Thank god for Winter's Bone. Oh and, The Hunger Games.

Brendan Fraser Allegedly Battered His William Tell Producer

For too long, notorious Hollywood tough guy Brendan Fraser has been leading with his fists, punching first and asking questions later. This knuckle-dragging philistine has been playing by his own rules for far too long, but finally, one movie produc…

Making Sense Of This Jeremy Lin Ordeal: Exotic Dancer Edition

Here’s an abridged version of the NBA offseason to date: The lockout changed nothing, owners didn’t learn, nor did they want to learn, because they’re still giving out awful contracts, and they just wanted to make sure they’d get more back from the …

Hilarious Grand Jury Testimony

David House testified in front of a grand jury about his potential association with Bradley Manning. On the advice of his lawyer, he took the fifth on every question except his name and birthdate.

The 18 Best Faces Watching Octomom Strip

Nadya Suleman, aka Octomom, performed at a Florida strip club for $5,000 this past weekend. The best part of the performance was the faces in the crowd. (But seriously, in all honesty, she looks pretty amazing for having 14 babies come out of her.)

People Really Like ‘The Dark Knight Rises’

With just 4 days until it’s release, Warner Brothers is finally giving critics who have seen ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ permission to publish their reviews, and according to the few that are online now, it seems Christopher Nolan is still really …

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