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March 28, 2011

I immediately searched Amazon for the "Pigeon Service Manual", but no such luck.

Natalie Portman covers her face with a tote bag as she leaves a building with fiance Benjamin Millepied on Sunday (March 27) in New York City.

Whoever you are, Lacey, you're my hero.

Planted tomato seeds and they grew into tomatoes?

@Johnny Cat - Look up "Huffy Slider". While it may not have the same steering design, I think it is pretty much marketed to this of us who are now adults and still wish we had our Green Machine.

Artist Joshua Kemble brings us this mashup of Link and Abraham Lincoln. First he saved the Union and then he saved Princess Zelda. Our greatest president since John Q-Bert Adams.

This is easily the best song I've heard in days weeks months YEARS. All hail Giovanna.

It's like watching a scene in a post-apocalypse movie.

While photos of Christina Aguilera making out with Matthew Rutler have been grabbing all the headlines, the unsung hero in all of this is the poor chauffeur who had front row tickets to the sticky bout of tonsil hockey. As the horror slowly dawns upon him, the contortions of his face are amazing.

FILTHY.

Coatis, also known as Brazilian aardvarks and snookum bears (seriously), are members of the raccoon family who are native to South America. They can also be found in Central America, Mexico and reflected in your ever-widening googly eyes when you see how cute they are as babies.

The creativity is strong in these ones. Being the Dark Lord of the galaxy isn't all force chokes and third degree lava burns. It's also fabulous cosplay costumes.

Happy Girl Scout cookie season! In honor of this special time of year, here are 14 facts you probably didn't know about them.

First there was the Guilty Dog. Now we have a Guilty Truck. I love you, internet!

Caption is NSFW Move over, Evil Knievel. This little girl feels the need for speed.

Photoshopped? Probably. Still gonna show it to everyone at the kennel where I work? Definitely.

OH, THIS MOVIE IS GOING TO BE EPIC!

With a bottle of wine in hand, Gaga celebrates her birthday with an impromptu performance of "Born This Way."

A safe sex ad campaign from MTV in the form of comic strips that detail improbable intercourse scenarios, with the tagline "Sex is no accident." If Rube Goldberg did cartoons for Penthouse.

I'm about three seconds away from throwing my keyboard across the room. And I can't stop.

Fuck Yeah, Interspecies Friendships is my new favorite tumblr. These pictures will make your heart melt! If these animals can learn to love each other, then why can't we humans?

A graph illustrating the perils of being a man who accompanies his girlfriend into a Victoria's Secret. Science. You can't argue with it.

SO CUTE! I CAN'T HANDLE THIS.

Sometimes cats have to duke it out to claim what’s rightfully theirs. That’ll teach you to play with MY piece of string.

From Urkel to Donkeylips, here are 25 people you should follow on Twitter. Will someone please show Blossom how to use a Groupon?!

A guy on the New York City subway loses himself in the hypnotic wonders of a Slinky. This may be the most pleasant subway video we have ever posted.

Dogboarding is that thing of where you ride your pet dog like a skateboard and do tricks on him or her.

Police officers whiling away the time in their squad cars with a game of computer Solitaire. Vigilance!

At least this version of Juno would've been more entertaining. Chris Beaumont takes time from making awesome CubeCrafts to give a new spin on popular and/or infamous films.

Some cats walk, but others fly! Here are some kitties who know that the ground isn’t always the best way to travel.

In the same vein as Garfield Minus Garfield, a Tumblr that accentuates the existential ennui of Charles Schulz's Peanuts by lopping off the last panel of the comic strip. As though Charlie Brown and Snoopy were cast in a Godard film. Much more over at 3eanuts.

Well, it already looks more plot cohesive than Transformers.

A 20-inch Egyptian cobra escaped from its enclosure in the reptile house of the Bronx Zoo, and people (specifically the media) are flipping the eff out. Its venom can kill an elephant. Hide your kids, hide your wife, hide your elephants.

Another stellar cover of the hit song "Friday."

Land sharks are funny. Until you realize that killer whales can do that.

He raises a good point. Is it meta-anarchy or irony-anarchy?

Machines like this office-place vending machine reject your perfectly crisp dollar bills out of sheer spite.

I think we can all agree that this is the best thing ever.

BEHOLD, the sequel to How to Make an American Quilt.

Colombia and Venezuela are really doing quite well in the World Girth and Boobage Cup.

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