1. Reading is the tried and true tradition that came before shade.
Miramax Films
Miramax Films
2. One resorts to READING when subtle shade is just not enough.
NBC / Via themikeylatelyshow.com
3. It is courteous to announce the reading.
Logo / Via tumblr.com
4. There is a theatricality to reading. It is a dramatic art. BRING THE DRAMATICS.
Bravo / Via gifsoup.com
5. Much like reading a book, you read with FLUENCY to exhibit proficiency.
ABC / Via sheknows.com
6. The opening line is fundamental. It must shock and awe the readee into silence.
Bravo / Via rtgifs.tumblr.com
7. Look them in the eyes and ENUNCIATE.EVERY.WORD.
Bravo
8. Be sure to point one finger directly at the readee.
Bravo / Via rtgifs.tumblr.com
9. But as you read, the finger must move in a wave-like motion.
Logo / Via tumblr.com
10. Snap throughout the reading.
Logo / Via reactiongifs.com
11. In between sentences, be sure to include a squint.
Fox / Via britneyspearsgifs.tumblr.com
12. Having spectators present will only ENHANCE the read.
Fox / Via rebloggy.com
13. Get some water, clear the throat, because you are delivering a SOLILOQUY.
C-SPAN / Via huskybro.com
14. TELL THE TRUTH AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH.
Derek Mega
15. NOTE: Reading is always a response to ratchetness.
Disney / Via gifboom.com
Ratchetness is obnoxious behavior that shocks and awes.
16. Lead with the shade, and if that doesn't work, rebuttal with a REAAADDDD.
17. Your voice should build to a FEVER PITCH.
Logo / Via missosology.info
18. ACT like you're READING FROM THE GOOD BOOK.
Warner Bros. / Via Derek Mega
19. Get close. LEAN ALL THE WAY IN.
Miramax Films / Via fuckyeahshuthefuckup.tumblr.com
20. USE THE COUNTDOWN.
VH1
The countdown is a method used to turn a read into a list. Before every point you say a number. Example: 5. I am very rich! 4. All my shit is expensive. 3. I'm cashing TRUMP CHECKS! 2. You don't want it. 1. What? I was just telling the truth.
21. Remember: You are READING FOR BLOOOOOOOOD.
Oxygen
22. Subtweet ≠ READING.
23. OWN THE READ with an ending like:
Bravo / Via realitytvgifs.tumblr.com
24. And then SASHAY AWAY.
youtube.com / Via gifsoup.com
And before a good read play this:
Looks like there are no comments yet.
Be the first to comment!
Looks like there are no comments yet.
Sign in and be the first to comment!
