This Transformers Review Is Better Than The Movie Itself

Australian film critic Marc Fennell absolutely nails it.

Marc Fennell is an Australian film critic, technology journalist, radio personality, author and television presenter. He hosts a variety of radio shows and podcasts, including “The Movie Guy”, in which he talks about recently released films.

Fennell has given glowing and insightful reviews to a handful of movies this year, including X-Men and Godzilla. Unfortunately for Michael Bay, Transformers ended up on Fennell’s shit list.

Fennell wrote and recorded a brilliantly detailed and intensely hateful review of Transformers: Age of Extinction for his podcast. Here are some highlights from his review, which is honestly probably more interesting than the movie itself (note: not difficult):

2. “I’m not a blockbuster snob. I love movies where shit explodes and people crack jokes and cities are flattened… but Transformers 4 is a movie of staggering, breathtaking, almost impressive stupidity.”

3. “[This is] the age of giant talking mechanical cash cows having their swollen mechano money milk teats tugged with the artless groping fury of a director who, SURE, could have made a worse movie, but only if he was in a medically induced coma.”

4. “There are so many American flags, pointless dramatic angles, and a cast so sweaty and orange they look like they have cirrhosis of the liver, that it’s basically like somebody has made a Michael Bay parody film.”

5. “With this movie they’ve literally started with the client list and somehow reverse engineered a plot out of it… and when I say plot, I mean something that was clearly written in crayon by toddlers.”

6. “The most nonsense piece of shit released in 2014 so far.”

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