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Here's What It's Actually Like To Own A Fitbit

Let's take this step by step.

1. You open your Fitbit and immediately light up with joy.

2. You start envisioning how healthy it will make you this year, how 2016 will totally be your YEAR OF YOU.

3. You download the app and immediately follow all of your friends who also have Fitbits.

4. And then you name-drop your new toy in every possible situation you can.

5. But the first full day you wear it around, you log only 4,000 steps — and you are BAFFLED.

6. So the next day, you wake up with one goal in mind: You will literally NOT STOP MOVING.

6. You go for a long run, you walk your dog TWICE, you go grocery shopping, and you even walk in place while watching TV.

7. Around 4 p.m., your Fitbit beeps: You've reached 10,000 steps!

8. At 11:55 p.m., you slyly check your best friend's steps for that day.

9. Since you still have five minutes until the day ends, you start running and jumping in place at 11:56 p.m., just to be sure you beat her.

10. The clock strikes midnight, and you check your stats: 15,000. And then you check hers: 14,700! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

11. You get your first email badge. It's a lighthouse! Apparently, you climbed 50 floors and therefore you are a lighthouse.

12. The next morning, you check your sleep patterns and see that you were "restless" over 30 times for the past couple of nights.

13. You freak out and buy a really expensive new mattress and new luxury sheets.

14. Your non-Fitbit friends start making fun of your new Fitbit addiction.

15. A few more days go by, and then one morning, you get to work — and realize you forgot your Fitbit.

16. At first, you feel very lost.

17. Like a part of you is missing.

18. You wonder if getting up to go to the bathroom is even worth it.

19. But as the day goes by, you realize you are actually fine without your other half.

20. The next morning, you put on your Fitbit — but sigh. You've lost that loving ~zest~.

22. When it beeps, you kinda just shrug.

23. And when you see that your friend got more steps than you did, you're too cozy in your new sheets to care.

24. But the next morning when you wake up, the itch is back! You want to win again. You NEED to win again.

25. And that's when you realize that on some days, you'll simply care about your specific numbers more than on others...