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Which Essential Waitrose Product Are You?

Let's be honest, reduced-fat Brussels pâté is a basic human right, really.

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  1. 1.

    Thinstock / BuzzFeed
  2. 2.

    Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    Slow walking
    Not moving down the carriage
    Standing on the left side of the escalator
    Asking someone from the north, “Is this near London?"
    Actually getting an elaborate response to the question “How are you?"
    Not buying a round when it’s someone's turn
    Still getting excited about the “Keep calm” poster
    Not appreciating the queuing etiquette
    Saying "soccer" instead of "football"
  3. 3.

    Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    H&M
    H&M
    Asos
    Asos
    Primark
    Primark
    Next
    Next
    Burton
    Burton
    Urban Outfitters
    Urban Outfitters
    American Apparel
    American Apparel
  4. 4.

    Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    Cecile
    Earl
    Beatrice
    Vincent
    Octavia
    Crawford
    Cordelia
    Rupert
    Henrietta
  5. 5.

    Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    Helena Bonham Carter
    Frazer Harrison / Getty Images
    Helena Bonham Carter
    Frazer Harrison / Getty Images
    Benedict Cumberbatch
    Neilson Barnard / Getty Images
    Benedict Cumberbatch
    Neilson Barnard / Getty Images
    Emma Stone
    Elisabetta Villa / Getty Images
    Emma Stone
    Elisabetta Villa / Getty Images
    Brad Pitt
    Chris Jackson / Getty Images
    Brad Pitt
    Chris Jackson / Getty Images
    Chloë Sevigny
    Laura Cavanaugh / Getty Images
    Chloë Sevigny
    Laura Cavanaugh / Getty Images
    Chris Pratt
    Stuart C. Wilson / Getty Images
    Chris Pratt
    Stuart C. Wilson / Getty Images
    Aubrey Plaza
    Jason Kempin / Getty Images
    Aubrey Plaza
    Jason Kempin / Getty Images
    Kanye West
    Chelsea Lauren / Getty Images
    Kanye West
    Chelsea Lauren / Getty Images
    Amy Poehler
    Monica Schipper / Getty Images
    Amy Poehler
    Monica Schipper / Getty Images
  6. 6.

    Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    Cakes
    Biscuits
    Neither
    Both
    Can we not?
    I refuse to answer this question
    Whatever, all it matters is that they’re delicious
    I don’t care, they’re foul anyway
    I don’t understand the question
  7. 7.

    Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    Babouche
    Babouche
    Oval Room Blue
    Oval Room Blue
    Alizarin Earth
    Alizarin Earth
    Final Furlong
    Final Furlong
    Starling's Egg
    Starling's Egg
    Blanched Almond
    Blanched Almond
    Beauvais Lilac
    Beauvais Lilac
    Pirate Gold
    Pirate Gold
    Marine Abyss
    Marine Abyss
  8. 8.

    "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." – Harry
    "Always." – Snape
    "Not my daughter, you bitch!" – Mrs Weasley
    "Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?" – Dumbledore
    "Yer a wizard, Harry." – Hagrid
    "After all, to the well-organised mind, death is but the next great adventure." – Dumbledore
    "Harry, please. You’re talking to the man who raised Fred and George." – Mr Weasley
    "I enjoyed the DA meetings, too. It was like having friends." – Luna Lovegood
    "What do we want to be Prefects for? It’d take all the fun out of life.” – George Weasley
  9. 9.

    Tinky Winky
    BBC
    Tinky Winky
    BBC
    Dipsy
    BBC
    Dipsy
    BBC
    Laa-Laa
    BBC
    Laa-Laa
    BBC
    Po
    BBC
    Po
    BBC
    Sun Baby
    BBC
    Sun Baby
    BBC
    Tubby custard machine
    BBC
    Tubby custard machine
    BBC
    Noo Noo
    BBC
    Noo Noo
    BBC
    The handbag full of homosexual agenda
    BBC
    The handbag full of homosexual agenda
    BBC
    The scooter
    Hasbro
    The scooter
    Hasbro

Which Essential Waitrose Product Are You?

You got: Glacé cherries

Everyone knows that glacé cherries are the foundation of a good food pyramid. They're a fruit AND a delicious, sweet treat. Vitamins and fun, all in one. Just like you.

Glacé cherries
Waitrose
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You got: Shaved Parmigiano Reggiano

Although you’re clearly essential, you’re a lot to handle at times. That why people like you best when served in small doses.

Shaved Parmigiano Reggiano
Waitrose
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You got: Artichoke hearts

If the heart stops beating, life ceases. If artichokes stop being essential, hundreds of people around the UK stop being gassy. A Waitrose miracle, much like yourself.

Artichoke hearts
Waitrose
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You got: Reduced-fat Brussels pâté

Posh and thick, it’s just what all your friends say about you. Keep it up.

Reduced-fat Brussels pâté
Waitrose
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You got: Baby avocados

When people can’t handle normal humans, that’s when you come in. You’re perfect, just the way you are. Small, not too intimidating, fresh.

Baby avocados
Waitrose
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You got: Ironing water

I hate to break this to you, but you’re very basic and replaceable. Essential, nonetheless.

Ironing water
Waitrose
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You got: Seafood cocktail deli filler

Some people, just like egg- and cress-filled sandwiches, are passé now. Luckily, you’re not one of them. Stay quirky and essential.

Seafood cocktail deli filler
Waitrose
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You got: Cypriot light halloumi cheese

There’s a great chance you’ve never even been to Cyprus. Stop pretending, you poser.

Cypriot light halloumi cheese
Waitrose
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You got: Limoncello dessert

Slightly sour, but ultimately sweet. Just like you. Every parent dreams of a kid like this. Never change.

Limoncello dessert
Waitrose
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