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15 Incredibly Frustrating Similarities Between Therapy And Dating

OK, this is clearly not working — do I really have to stay for the full hour?

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Trying to find a therapist is daunting, to say the least.

Especially because having a great connection with this person is super important.

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This is your mental health, after all. You definitely want to take your time and find someone you mesh with.

If you've spent much time looking for a therapist, you may have noticed it can feel eerily similar to another tedious search in your life...dating.

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Sure, both are worth it in the end, but that doesn't mean the process doesn't suck sometimes.

1. You don't even know where to start looking for the right person.

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So many fish in the sea.

2. Going online is fine and all, but it's hard to judge how well you'll ~mesh~ from that alone.

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Like, good to know you have a degree and everything, but why is your online presence so VAGUE?

3. You consider letting your friend set you up with someone they've heard good things about (or maybe even tried themselves), but that's...weird.

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There are few things you don't want to have in common with your friends, but someone who knows all of your neuroses and vulnerabilities just might be one of them.

4. You have to make a decision about who's your ~type~.

Birds of a feather or opposites attract? Would you do better with cognitive behavioral therapy or psychotherapy? Are you really equipped to decide what your perfect match would be?
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Birds of a feather or opposites attract? Would you do better with cognitive behavioral therapy or psychotherapy? Are you really equipped to decide what your perfect match would be?

5. You always seem to have to decide between convenience and connection.

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Is a promising match really worth that hour commute on public transit?

6. You stress before every first meeting wondering what they'll think of you.

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WILL THEY LIKE ME?

7. You know within, like, the first five minutes if it’s not going to work out, but you feel like you need to stick it out to be polite.

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We both know this isn't going well...can't we just call it a night?

8. You don’t know how much you should really reveal the first time you meet.

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Like, do you play it cool and pretend to have at least some of your shit together?

9. You're secretly (or not so secretly) really curious about who else they're seeing.

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You know it's maybe inappropriate to ask, but you kinda want to know how you stack up.

10. You eventually get really good at asking the right questions to see if the two of you will be compatible.

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11. But just when things seem to be going well, they might say something that makes you want to yell.

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Whoa. Did you just low-key slut-shame me?

12. You think about calling off the search every time you suffer through a miserable hour with someone new.

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Seriously, it can't be worth all this stress.

13. Or maybe you consider sticking with someone who's mediocre, just to avoid getting back on the market.

14. And when you DO find someone decent, you wonder how soon is too soon to call for a second meetup.

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I DON'T WANT TO COME ON TOO STRONG.

15. But eventually, you really do find someone who gets you and makes you feel comfortable, heard, and understood.

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If you still haven't found a great therapist, don't lose hope. This guide to starting therapy is a great place to start.