Quiz

BuzzFeed Staff

As/Is

It doesn't matter what your actual sign is.

Which Of J. Crew's New Horoscope T-Shirts Are You?

Pick a taylor swift album for a roadtrip:

pick a starbucks drink to spill on your lap on said road trip:

If you had to have a penis shaped like one of these noodles which would you pick?

"I'm a Taurus, we're bullheaded" is a great excuse for being insufferable all the time.

Taurus

You're better than other people and you don't care who knows it! That's why you need an embroidered tee. Printed graphics? That's so Libra.

Scorpio

You project a sense of chill spontaneity to disguise to the deep existential dread that boils constantly within.

Aquarius

It's true what they say about Geminis: you're two faced. Your two faces? Sad, and sadder.

Gemini

You constantly remind people Aries is a fire sign because nobody every remembers Aries is even part of the zodiac.

Aries

Sagittarius

You're laughing on the outside but we can see the sadness in your eyes.

You hate everyone but are too shy to say anything so your brain is a constantly stirring stew of unsaid comebacks and imaginary triumphs.

Virgo

You project a confident sense of whimsy to distract people from your thoroughly incompetent sense of whimsy.

Capricorn

Cancer

You decide to remove the letters from the front of this shirt because it would be cute with just the back but you lose enthusiasm and quit halfway through.

Pisces

Libra's crave balance. In one hand you've got crippling existential dread. In the other? Extreme malaise. Balance!

Libra

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Which Of J. Crew's New Horoscope T-Shirts Are You?

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