Here Is What Happened At Every Kardashian Wedding, And All I Want To Know Is Which Would You Have Wanted An Invite To
Every single one has been an ~experience~ in its own special way.
If, like me, you've been keeping up with the Kardashians for the last decade-plus, you've seen some stuff.
There have been good times, bad times, and hyper-dramatic times, like weddings.
We haven't been privy to every Kardashian wedding that's happened, but in the years since, we've learned quite a bit about a few of them.
So here's the breakdown of everything we know about all the Kardashian weddings because I have to know which one you'd angle for an invite to.
Kris Houghton and Robert Kardashian tied the knot on July 8, 1978.
Highlights from this wedding include a fresh-faced Kris, a serious porn stache from Robert, gratuitous O.J. Simpson appearances, and bridesmaids in all white.
Kris and Rob were married for 12 years and had four kids during that time: Kourtney, Kim, Khloé, and Rob. They divorced in 1991 but remained friendly until Robert's death from esophageal cancer in 2003.
Kris moved on with Olympic gold medalist and motivational speaker Caitlyn Jenner. The pair were married in an intimate backyard wedding in April 1991 and created a massive blended family.
Their kids served as their wedding party at the event. "It was a very intimate, small wedding — I had such a big wedding the first time, and we just really wanted close family and friends," Kris told Oprah Winfrey in a 2012 interview.
Caitlyn had four kids of her own at the time. The couple would go on to add Kendall and Kylie Jenner to the family.
We saw the best and worst of Kris and Caitlyn play out on KUWTK. Ultimately, the pair split in 2013 and divorced by the end of 2014. In April 2015, Caitlyn introduced herself to the world as a woman.
Kim Kardashian was the first of the next generation to get married. At 19 years old, she married 29-year-old music producer Damon Thomas in 2000.
Believe it or not, Kim's first wedding was a Vegas quickie (during which she was allegedly on ecstasy).
They were married for four years and split in 2004, with Kim accusing Damon of physical and emotional abuse in paperwork filed as part of their divorce.
Then, there was almost a Kourtney Vegas wedding in 2007 when she briefly agreed to marrying then-boyfriend Scott Disick in Vegas.
Thaaaat's right, dolls. Kourtney and Scott came decently close to tying the knot in 2007, but momager KJ intervened. She wasn't Scott's biggest fan at the time and objected to members of the family being missing.
Khloé would end up the next Kardashian to walk down the aisle when she said yes to then-Los Angeles Laker Lamar Odom. It was a major moment because it was the first time we actually got to watch a Kardashian wedding play out.
It was also a pretty big deal because it was the first time we got to see our girl Khloé in love. Khloé and Lamar were married at the home of friend Irving Azoff.
The wedding was a black-tie affair where Khloé wore a mermaid silhouette Vera wang gown with a wrapped bodice and pleated skirt. The look was topped off by a unique lilac satin ribbon belt with crystals. Guests couldn't snap photos because they had to leave their BlackBerrys at the door.
Khloé's bridesmaids — Kim, Kourtney, Kendall, Kylie, Malika and Khadijah Haqq, and Lauren London — wore lavender gowns and carried white roses.
After the romantic, traditional ceremony, guests partied in a "Hollywood nightclub-themed reception."
Khloé and Lamar's whirlwind romance came to an end in 2013, but they wouldn't divorce until 2016.
2011 brought us the INFAMOUS Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries nuptials.
Nevertheless, they tied the knot in a major KUWTK moment. Kris and Kim wed in a black-tie affair on August 20, 2011.
Kim wore not one...
...but THREE Vera Wang dresses throughout the black-and-white themed event.
The wedding was ENORMOUS, with over 450 guests including Ciara, Gwen Stefani, Fergie, Eva Longoria, and Mario Lopez. The couple was even serenaded by Robin Thicke.
Kim and Kris, as you may recall, called it quits after 72 days of marriage. It was something.
At the risk of one-upping herself, Kim truly took weddings to the next level in her gorgeous, gaudy Italian wedding to Kanye West on May 24, 2014.
The bride wore a custom lace long-sleeve Givenchy gown by creative director Riccardo Tisci, complete with a cathedral-length veil.
Kimye tied the knot in Florence, at the historic Forte di Belvedere. The 16th-century fortress was built to show off the power and wealth of the Medici family.
There were just 200 guests in attendance this time, including Kim's sisters, who once again served as bridesmaids in white.
Andrea Bocelli and John Legend performed for the couple and their guests, who sat at a 224-foot marble table with their names engraved in their respective spots. There was also a wooden bar that Kanye sawed in half an hour before the wedding, in the name of art.
And last but most certainly not least, we've got Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker's three weddings. Kravis has been the punk-prep couple of many people's dreams, and frankly, everyone is just so damn happy to see Kourtney being loved and appreciated for who she is.
Kravis took their first stab at getting hitched in Vegas at 2 a.m. after the Grammys on April 4, 2022. They exchanged vows, but no marriage license meant this was just a practice run for the two, complete with an Elvis impersonator.
They made it official in Santa Barbara on May 15, 2022. Their courthouse nuptials had Travis's dad, Randy, and Kourtney's grandma, MJ, as witnesses.
But the big wedding was in Italy's Villa Olivetta, a home on the Dolce & Gabbana's Portofino estate. The whole Kar-Jenner-Disick-Barker clan was dressed in Dolce & Gabbana as they watched Kourtney and Travis say their "I dos."
Kourtney wore a corset-style short dress with an insanely ornate veil that showed the same image of the Virgin Mary that Travis has tattooed on his head.
Kris walked Kourtney down the aisle. After the ceremony, the couple was treated to Andrea Bocelli performing an Elvis tune as they had their first dance. Guests ate homemade pasta and cannolis during the event.
OK, now that you've seen them all, it's time for the big vote.
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Which of all the Kardashian weddings has been the best?
vote votesKris + Robert
vote votesKris + Caitlyn