Welcome back to the post series where I literally just write down whatever I'm thinking while watching House of the Dragon. If you wanna check out last week's recap, here it is!
Let's jump into Episode 2, titled "The Rogue Prince":
1. AHHHHH the opening credits are back!
2. Honestly, I think it's a good move to bring these back and to not change the theme song. It still slaps.
3. Oh good, a river of blood.
4. Are these Targaryen crests? They're definitely not representing any of the other houses.
5. This looks more like it's a layout of Valyria as opposed to King's Landing, so I'm gonna assume they're all Targaryen crests. Someone correct me if I'm wrong.
6. Move over river of blood, now we have...crabs eating people alive!
7. People have died in some horrible ways in this world (I'm partial to "crown of molten gold"), but being picked apart slowly by hundreds of crabs is up there.
8. "Crabfeeder" is an apt name, then.
9. You can practically see the future spirit of Daenerys smiling and nodding as Rhaenya suggests just, y'know, burning the shit out of the pirates with a dragon.
10. The Game of Thrones franchise is so funny, because you always know that something as minor as choosing a new king's guard will eventually snowball into like 50,000 people dying.
11. Viserys still playing with his Legos.
12. Oh wow, Corlys and Rhaenys are making a strong play here.
13. Uh, isn't their daughter like 10 years old?
14. I'm very much hoping they had another daughter who wasn't at the tournament who is at least SLIGHTLY OLDER.
15. Now they're using MAGGOTS? Not sure if the throne or the maesters are killing Viserys faster.
16. Maybe, like, dull the swords a little if they're gonna be your chair.
17. Okay, they do NOT have an older daughter, we were talking about the VERY SMALL CHILD.
18. He is literally talking about dragons with a small child whose parents are trying to marry her to him, this is so uncomfy. I'm half expecting Chris Hansen to show up.
19. "Do you remind your father's men of that as you carry their cups?" OUCH.
20. Poor Alicent. I feel like Emily Carey is playing this like she's just being nice, and that she's unaware that her father is pushing her onto Viserys.
21. Daemon announcing a royal wedding to his second wife, claiming she's already pregnant, and taking his dead infant nephew's dragon egg for the cradle is the most Daemon thing ever.
22. Amazing what a little fog can do to make a place look evil. Here's Dragonstone when Daenerys was there and Jon Snow arrived:
And here's Dragonstone under Daemon's rule:
Kinda ruins the view, doesn't it?
23. "Perhaps my prince recalls when I knocked him off his horse." Daaaamn fire cannot burn a dragon, but Ser Criston can.
24. Daemon even holds his sword in the most dramatic, most extra way possible.
25. OH SHIT it's Rhaenyra!
26. Dragon fiiiiiiiiight!
27. Daemon is just getting wrecked this episode. Loses the standoff, gives up the egg, and gets chewed out by his girlfriend.
28. How long do you think we have before that little model dragon breaks again? Y'know, for metaphor's sake.
29. "What's to mislike?" "She is 12." GOOD POINT.
30. Aww, Viserys and Rhaenyra are actually connecting a little here.
31. Two storm-outs in one meeting! That's a record thus far. Good job, Viserys.
32. Well, can't say I didn't see THAT reveal coming.
33. Viserys has ignored Corlys pretty much entirely. He's bleeding allies here.
34. What was that quote from Maester Aemon? "Love is the death of duty."
35. I mean, I don't want to encourage anyone marrying a 12-year-old either, but let's not pretend that the wedding between the 16-year-old and the 50-year-old is all fine and dandy.
36. This must be our crabfeeder! Creepy.