So, here's what happened: A guy on Twitter tried to make the argument that he needed an assault rifle in order to stave off the "30–50 feral hogs" that allegedly swarm his yard within 3–5 minutes every time his kids play outside.
@JasonIsbell Legit question for rural Americans - How do I kill the 30-50 feral hogs that run into my yard within 3-5 mins while my small kids play?
The idea that this man was fighting off upwards of 30 hogs every time his kids went outdoors sent Twitter into a meme frenzy, and just about everyone had a Feral Hog Tweet™. Here are the best of the best:
1.
take me down to the paradise city where the hogs are feral and there's 30-50
2.
It goes like this the fourth the fifth fifty hogs surround my kids
3.
It is a truth universally acknowledged that 30-50 feral hogs, in possession of a large fortune, must be in want of a yard with small children.
4.
This is Just to Say I have eaten the kids that were in the backyard Who you probably left for three to five minutes Forgive me I am thirty to fifty feral hogs
5.
@aljwhite
6.
MY (25M) HOGS (30-50) HAVE UNIONIZED
7.
30-50 feral hogs?! At this time of year At this time of day In this part of the country Localized entirely within your backyard with your small kids?
8.
INTERVIEWER: what’s your biggest weakness as an employee? ME: 30-50 feral h— INTERVIEWER: (jotting down notes) always an hour too late to every meme, got it
9.
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, nevermind it’s 50 feral hogs.
10.
30-50 feral hogs? sounds like my dating history lmao
11.
I am a: ⚪️ male ⚪️ female 🔘 30-50 feral hogs Seeking: ⚪️ male ⚪️ female 🔘 a yard with unsupervised small children to run in to within 3-5 minutes
12.
me, opening twitter: I wonder what surreal thing we've latched onto today to self-medicate from the horrors of observing the greatest crises of the anthropocene era twitter: thirty to fifty feral hogs me: ah, good, thank you.
13.
14.
Feral hogs, doo doo doo doo doo doo Feral hogs, doo doo doo doo doo doo Feral hogs, doo doo doo doo doo doo Feral hogs! Eat the kids, doo doo doo doo doo doo Eat the kids, doo doo doo doo doo doo Eat the kids, doo doo doo doo doo doo Eat the kids! In my yard, doo doo doo doo d
15.
Welcome to the jungle We've got fun and games We've got thirty feral hogs Or fifty, in that range
16.
Legit question for medieval saints - How do I kill the 30-50 feral hogs that run into my room within 3-5 mins while I am doing holy things? (BnF, MS Français 50, f. 265v)
17.
30-50 feral hogs. Not great, not terrible.
18.
Please help there’s 30-50 Pharrell hogs in my yard, they won’t stop singing Happy #feralhogs
19.
What idiot called it “fighting 30-50 feral hogs” and not “serving in the Boar War”
20.
When there’s exactly 29 feral hogs in your yard. https://t.co/bGvR040KA7
21.
3-TO-5 MINUTE CRAFT: *puts 30 feral hogs in vinegar* Wait one day. *50 feral hogs come out* Bigger than before.
22.
IS YOUR CHILD TEXTING ABOUT 30 - 50 FERAL HOGS? OMG - Opening My Gate CBA - Children Be Accessible FFS - Fifty Feral Swines FML - Five Minutes (or) Less SMH - Scolding Many Hogs GTG - Gallivanting Towards Garden NP - Naughty Pigs OMFG - Obey My Feral Guys
23.
good morning 30-50 feral hogs. lets get these children in 3-5 minutes
24.
I’m sorry
25.
If you’re not able to shoot 30-50 feral hogs, store-bought is fine.
26.
Telling people "I don't have kids" - invites too many questions - people feel entitled to tell you about why you should - vague Telling people "30-50 feral hogs ate my kids" - specific - no follow-up questions needed - people stop talking to you
27.
30-50 feral hogs coming into into my yard 3-5 minutes after my kids go outside to play
28.
ladies if he: - never texts back - never apologises - cannot be brought down by small arms fire - stampedes at your small kids he's not your man. he's 30-50 feral hogs
29.
30-50 Feral Hogs & Shaw
30.
I got 99 problems and feral hogs are 30-50 of them
31.
Hot Thirty to Fifty Feral Hogs Summer
32.
Look this is clearly better than normal twitter, what if we all just never stopped tweeting about the hogs