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69 Thoughts I Had Watching This Week's "Game Of Thrones," Including "NICE"

The real tragedy is about Jon and his missing boat.

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1. WHOOOOO'S READY FOR A ROYAL MEETING?

2. AND POSSSSSSIBLY SOME INCESTUAL SEXUAL TENSION?

3. Seriously, what are the current betting odds on Jon and Daenerys banging before they realize they're related?

4. It's not like it'd be new, uncharted territory on this show.

5. OH SHIT it's at the start of the episode! They're already at Dragonstone!

6. I am 100% gleeful at this Jon–Tyrion reunion.

7. Jon was really concerned about his boat.

8. Aww, Tyrion asked about Sansa.

9. "And unconsummated." Lol.

10. "I'm not a Stark" — BRUH YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.

11. Jon has officially seen a dragon now and things are HAPPENING.

12. Oh shit, Varys and Melisandre are getting aggressively sassy.

13. I was wondering how Mel was going to avoid the awkwardness. Turns out "run away to a different continent" is the answer.

14. THEY'RE HERE IT'S HAPPENING.

15. I will never get tired of people making fun of Dany's really long title.

16. Ever.

17. JON'S SAD FACE AT HIS LACK OF TITLES.

18. Holy shit Daenerys is actually apologizing for something.

19. "I am the last Targaryen, Jon Snow" — NO YOU AIN'T.

20. Living for the awkwardness here.

21. Girl, you have dragons and you don't believe in zombies?

22. LAY IT ON HER, DAVOS.

23. Nothing is as good as a Ser Davos speech.

24. What is with the streets of King's Landing and people having to walk through them while getting pelted with shit?

25. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if Cersei told everybody to get out there and abuse the prisoners on their walk.

26. Euron, you know Cersei's just gonna kill you by the time the war's over, right?

27. Jesus, Euron is really pushing Jaime's buttons for no good reason.

28. Oh fuck did Cersei do the poison kiss?

29. That's even harsher than I thought it would be.

30. "You will live to watch your daughter rot." Fuuuuuuuuuck.

31. Cersei is on a roll. An evil, awful roll.

32. I don't think Mycroft is really buying any of this.

33. Honestly this whole Iron Bank conversation is giving me student loan stress.

34. "You look a lot better brooding than I do." It's a brood-off!

35. "You took my ship." See, he really was upset about the boat! He loves that boat.

36. I'll watch an entire episode of just Jon and Tyrion talking.

37. "Are you trying to present your own statements as ancient wisdom?" Lol yep.

38. Y'all I still can't believe Jon Snow and Daenerys frickin' Targaryen are just like, having conversations.

39. It's fucking awesome.

40. Also Jon looks so damn out of place in the south it's hilarious.

41. Damn, Sansa's killing it thus far at this whole "being in charge" thing.

42. You know what would really be a great idea? If she ordered Littlefinger to just be beheaded right now.

43. IS BRAN HERE?!?!?!

44. OMG.

45. OMG.

46. Brb, just gotta sob for a bit.

47. I will never stop being thrilled about Stark reunions, so honestly I'm happy they're pacing them out.

48. Bran's gotta lighten up though, man.

49. And stop freaking her out by talking about the night she got raped, dude. Jesus.

50. OK please tell me Jorah is healthy.

51. HE'S OKAY!

52. Whoa Sam listen I get we're all happy but you don't HAVE to shake his hand.

53. "I read the book and followed the instructions" is the Westeros version of "I googled it."

54. Everybody pray for Grey Worm because I'm not gonna be OK if he dies.

55. OH SHIT Y'ALL Tyrion built the sewers! For his secret hoes!

56. "As a good friend of mine once said, 'Give me 10 good men and I'll impregnate the bitch.'" Bronn shout-out.

57. GREY WORM IS OK!

58. Oh no.

59. Fucking Euron.

60. Nooooooo Bronn is with the Lannisters. I totally forgot.

61. Lady Olenna is still such a fucking boss.

62. "You must be very wise by now." SASSY AS FUCK TO THE VERY END.

63. "He really was a cunt, wasn't he?" THE HITS KEEP COMING.

64. I'm gonna miss her.

65. A glass of wine. Fitting.

66. Ohhhhh she's gonna confess.

67. "I want her to know it was me."

68. What a fucking BOSS.

69. RIP Olenna I'm gonna end this thing on #69 for you girl because that was NICE.

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