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    Apr 29, 2020

    21 Clean Jokes That Are So Dumb They're Actually Funny

    "What do you call a crocodile that is also a detective? An investi-gator."

    1. I submitted 10 puns to a joke-writing competition to see if any of them made the finals.

    Sadly, no pun in ten did.

    Po1sonator

    2. Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke?

    Joke, joke, joooooooooooooke.

    chucklesnatas

    3. What do you do if you see a fireman?

    Put it out, man!

    via 7in7

    Paramount

    4. What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

    One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

    FlyingByNight

    5. What do you call a crocodile that is also a detective?

    An investi-gator.

    Faiz_Clan

    6. I can cut a piece of wood in half just by looking at it.

    You might not believe me, but it's true! I saw it with my own eyes.

    ChewyNutCluster

    Warner Bros.

    7. George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Matthew McConaughey get together to make a movie.

    Clooney says, "I'll direct."

    DiCaprio says, "I'll act."

    McConaughey says, "I'll write, I'll write, I'll write."

    ChatchaAtcha

    8. I went to a wedding where two satellite dishes got married.

    The ceremony wasn't great, but the reception was AMAZING.

    Storm_Shadow

    9. If you think Thursdays are depressing, just wait two days...

    It'll be a sadder day.

    MisterMajik2000

    Paramount

    10. Apparently you can't use "beef stew" as a password.

    It's not stroganoff.

    TheAmericanWay1597

    11. What do you call a magician who has lost their magic?

    Ian.

    jamesallen1977

    12. Why was 2019 afraid of 2020?

    Because they had a fight and 2021.

    Ramzee24

    NBC

    13. What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account?

    Prime mates.

    raydeep

    14. A man walks into a lawyer's office and asks, "How much do you charge?"

    The lawyer says, "$5,000 for three questions."

    "Wow, that's pretty expensive, isn't it?" the man asks.

    "Yes," says the lawyer. "Now, what's your third question?"

    ZinMan

    Hulu

    15. What do we want? Low-flying airplane noises!

    When do we want them? NNNNNEEEEOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

    Hamburgler007

    16. Not only is my new thesaurus terrible...

    ...it's also terrible.

    itman290

    CBS

    17. How does NASA organize a party?

    They planet.

    jaypo822

    18. What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

    Same middle name.

    NBC

    19. What do you say to your sister when she's crying?

    "Are you having a cri-sis?"

    BassWizard420

    20. I can't take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him.

    I guess that's what I get for buying a pure bread dog.

    21. I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon.

    I'll let you know.

    JohnathanWickers

    TBS

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