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    17 Things Every Married Person Does When Their Spouse Goes Out Of Town

    Trashy TV show? Check. Pile of junk food? Check.

    1. Sprawl out over the entire bed.

    Georgerudy / Getty Images

    Even if your bed is king sized, you're STILL going to sleep diagonally across the entire thing, just because you can.

    2. Eat tons of junk food.

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    Basically, the only time you're leaving the house is to go to the grocery store and buy frozen food like you're a college kid again.

    3. Refuse to cook anything...unless it's breakfast for dinner.

    Wife, kids out of town so of course it’s pancakes & beer for dinner

    Nothing like a good brinner.

    4. Binge-watch all your guilty pleasure TV shows.

    Maybe your spouse doesn't like reality shows, or horror series, or naturally that's all you're going to watch all weekend.

    5. Play video games until your eyes bleed.

    Wife is out of town this weekend. Gonna use the free time to catch up with some old friends.

    Finally, you can Fortnite until your thumbs fall off.

    6. Watch horror movies at night, and IMMEDIATELY regret it.

    Who watches the original Halloween 🎃 filmed in 1978 by themselves during a storm while their husband is out of town? Me! And then the power goes out during the movie. Ha ha. I’m just saying 🤪🤪

    7. Triple-check that the doors are locked at night...

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    8. ...Maybe even sleep with a light on...

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    9. ...But still jump at every random sound you hear.

    Marcos Calvo / Getty Images


    10. Chew your food extra carefully.


    You start to think about that episode of 30 Rock where Liz Lemon starts to choke alone in her apartment and has to do the Heimlich using a chair, so you take your time while eating all your junk food.

    11. Put off showering.


    12. Poop with the bathroom door open.

    ama_deus / Via

    I mean, why bother?

    13. Throw a party, or go out partying.

    SME / Via

    You can have friends over and get as rowdy as you want!

    14. Break the "house rules."

    Is the dog usually not allowed to sleep in the bed? Well, not according to YOUR rules!

    15. Set the temperature however you damn well please.

    The wife’s out of town for the rest of the week, you know what that means......thermostat getting set to 65 and staying that way! #BachelorLife

    16. Put off cleaning until right before they get back.

    Elenaleonova / Getty Images

    But eventually you do have to tidy up to hide the shame of all the fast food you got.

    17. Miss them terribly.


    Sure, all that junk food and extra room on the bed is nice, but nothing beats having your favorite person around.

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