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43 Things You Can't Unsee At A Beauty Pageant For Bros

Fireball, fedoras and way too many Spandexed crotches at Mr. Marina, San Francisco's infamous all-bro beauty competition.

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Now in its fourth year, San Francisco's Mr. Marina Contest is a baffling show of bro-dom.

The Marina neighborhood is essentially the city's Frat Row, a haven for freshly sprung college grads to live together in tiny apartments and chug Bud Light Lime at happy hour after clocking out of their finance jobs. At its annual pageant, 12 contestants compete to see who can reign as the king of an area code known for day drinking, shirtless lawn games and frat guys who will just never leave the lifestyle.

Far from the displays of turbo drinking that marked the event's first edition, the pageant benefits the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and this year raised an impressive $190,000 for the cause. The boys are judged on a combination of their scores from each of the three rounds, plus a huge emphasis on their individual fundraising efforts.

Take it away, boys:

4. A program booklet designed to resemble the controversial The League dating app.

Andrew Dalton/Buzzfeed

(The app, which requires users to sign up with their LinkedIn profiles and only admits the most "elite," boasts a 75,000 wait list.)

12. Serious gamefaces. (The event follows the traditional Miss America format with a swimwear portion, a talent segment and a "Marina-wear" Q&A round where contestants show off their very best fist-pumping and "sky's out, thighs out" attire.)

14. The reigning Mr. Marina judging his fellow bro's yoga form.

Andrew Dalton/Buzzfeed

Jeff "Jay-Z" Zeller (right) took home the crown in 2014 thanks in part to a stunning Macklemore impression.

16. A merman in a cardboard seashell.

Andrew Dalton/Buzzfeed

Contestant Frankie Arias wants to be where the people are, walking around on those — what do you call 'em? Sperry Topsiders.

25. Bros in body suits covering the dance from Sia's "Chandelier"

Andrew Dalton/Buzzfeed

They weren't as good as 12-year-old Maddie Ziegler, but they deserve some props for the effort.

27. Simulated morning-after snapchatting.

Andrew Dalton/Buzzfeed

For his talent segment, Spencer Tochterman showed off a typical weekend morning routine to the tune of Ke$ha's Tik-Tok

36. This contestant who doesn't know his mom flew in from out of town and is standing right behind him.

Andrew Dalton/Buzzfeed

Theresa Thomas is a cancer survivor who had to be there to surprise her boy on his big day.

39. Michael Thomas, your Mr. Marina 2015, beams for the camera.

Andrew Dalton/Buzzfeed

Michael, who is 26, works in "Finance @ Google," describes himself as "preppy by day, sexy by night" and is a "devout Sunday Funday-er."

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