The 28 Worst Things That Can Ever Happen To A Pot Head
Puff, puff, puff, puff, puff, puff– PASS, DUDE!
When you have all the necessary joint-making supplies on hand, and then realize you're out of rolling paper.
Then checking your emergency stash and discovering that's empty, too.
Or worse, when you've smoked so much already that you've forgotten where you've hidden the supplies.
Rolling a great joint, then realising you don't have a lighter just when you're about to spark it.
When there are too many people in the circle and that one dude takes more than three puffs.
When you have the munchies but you open the fridge and it's empty.
Then you decide to order in, but it's too late, and everything is closed.
And if you manage to find someplace open, your insane paranoia results in a flood of unnecessary pleasantries during your exchange with Dominos delivery dude.
Your long time dealer goes out of town.
Or ever worse, they decide not to deal anymore because they're turning over a new leaf.
When you have to carry out a conversation with your landlord/parents/boss after you've just smoked a fat one.
Getting home baked outta your mind, and trying not to break things/fall over/make an excessive amount of noise and wake everyone up.
When people start talking about serious things and your high is under threat of coming down.
When people around you start discussing politics and global conflicts and stuff, and your brain turns into this:
When you're offered brownies, you take a bite, and you realise they're actually just brownies.
I think you forgot the secret ingredient. Drugs. The secret ingredient is drugs.
When you have an insanely good idea that you know will win you points with your boss, but you've smoked so much that you forget it instantly.
So then you start writing down all the "brilliant" ideas you have when you're blazed... But when you read through them sober, you realise you're an idiot.
Your eyes are teeny-tiny and red as all hell, and you have places to be, but you can't find your eye-drops.
Not understanding why, if there are smoking rooms in airports/offices/hotels, why there aren't any toking rooms.
Eating enough for the entire table after smoking, and then realising that everyone is looking at you.
Also the sheer fear of walking past a dog (any dog), even when you don't have any stash on you.
When people give you business cards that are not square, and you can't use them as roach material.
Hearing this question every time you recommend a film/book/TV show:
Not having a "weed guy" in your neighborhood/friend-circle/office.
When you hear a song with police sirens built in, and you're like "Holy shit, they know!"
Desperately needing water but the bottle is too far away and you're sinking into the couch.
When you move cities, and you have to find a new dealer.
And, of course, just not having any ~supplies~ when you really, really just want a hit.
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