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1. A TubShroom drain protector invented by a wizard to catch all the hair in your shower (the kind that inevitably leads to clogs). Just think of this magic weapon as your new bathroom bodyguard *and* an easy way to avoid emergency phone calls to your plumber.
2. A hard water stain-remover so that your faucets and glass doors can finally look squeaky clean. So long, days of staring at my gross shower head that still looks awful despite hours (upon hours) of scrubbing.
3. A PanOxyl foaming wash that screeches "get out" to pesky pimples thanks to a hefty helping of benzoyl peroxide — this bottle contains a whopping 10%, to be exact. Consider acne good as gone when placing this maximum strength formula in your medicine cabinet.
4. A shower brush reviewers swear is *way* more efficient than the $1 mesh loofah you haven't replaced in, oh, let's not talk about how many years. This lathers beautifully, is easy to grip, provides gentle exfoliation, and doesn't become a breeding ground for bacteria thanks to its silicone design.
5. A shower curtain liner with mesh pockets for anyone done with cluttering the corners of their (very tiny) bathtub via an excess of shampoo bottles. You like one for volume and you like the other for strength; I get it. This makes it easy to store a ton of stuff without making your tub feel cluttered.
6. A Billie starter kit that includes a colorful ergonomic handle, two rust- and nickel-free razor blades, *and* a magnetic holder that will actually adhere to your shower wall (a true miracle).
7. Or a Command razor holder with a water-resistant strip that is *truly* water-resistant and actually stays put. It's even equipped with drainage holes to get rid of excess water, thus preventing gross rust from forming on your probably-should-be-replaced-anyway disposable razor.
8. A shower seat because enough is enough — stop contorting your body every time you need to shave a leg. Just prop your foot onto this sturdy stool, grab your trusty razor, and voilà! Your legs are now shaved and you didn't have to attempt a downward dog to do it.
9. A Luv Scrub mesh body exfoliator that stretches up to 50 inches, aka back scrubs will no longer require contortionist-worthy flexibility. Skin smoother than any baby's rear end is yours for the taking with this pink shower must-have.
10. A Vanicream gentle body wash that's raved about by those with sensitive complexions — because the heavily perfumed suds you've been using are irritating and drying, ergo, the time has come to *finally* swap in this dye-, fragrance-, and sulfate-free bottle (it's super moisturizing, to boot).
11. An over-the-drain protector for anyone with a pop-up drain that is a: the bane of their existence and b: constantly getting clogged. This can quickly be placed on top of the drain to trap gunk, plus can be easily removed and cleaned.
12. A fog-free shower mirror that allows you to shave *does double take* IN THE SHOWER! Long gone will be the days of having to painstakingly clean your sink of excess cream and stubble. Plus, the heat from your shower will loosen up hair follicles to ensure a closer shave.
13. A grout cleaner that clings to silicone sealants (so the thin area around your shower head, in between your tiles, etc.) and effectively banishes mold and mildew to the pits of heck forever, which is where they rightfully belong. Someone contact Dante and let him know we've got another inferno contender.
14. A John Frieda brunette-enhancing glaze ideal for anyone trying to extend time between salon visits *or* anyone trying to nix salon visits all together. This weekly treatment focuses on maximizing shine for a mirror-like effect while bringing out your natural brown color.
15. A Frank Body scalp scrub because clarifying shampoo is great at getting rid of grease, but it'll also chase the color out of your hair faster than you can say ~ghosted.~ This coffee, rosemary, eucalyptus, and peppermint blend gets rid of the built-up gunk in your roots so that you don't feel greasy a mere three hours after exiting the shower. You'll feel squeaky clean! And your blond highlights will remain totally safe!
16. A FlexiSnake millipede that's not meant for the faint of heart. Use this to easily de-clog every drain in your home, but prepare for the horror you'll experience as you dig up about one million pounds of hair and built-up gunk.
17. A vegan and cruelty-free Ghost shampoo capable of cutting down on grease *without* being too harsh on your mane. A mix of moringa oil, quinoa protein, and sunflower seed extract works together to repair damage and strengthen your hair...all while stopping dryness and brassiness in their tracks.
18. An exfoliating towel so you can tackle a word that strikes fear into your heart: backne. This effectively removes layers of dead skin that would otherwise lead to scarring — reviewers swear by using this in combo with Mario Badescu botanical body soap to make their back all but invincible to breakouts.
19. A set of cleaning sponges that may have been invented by an actual magician, as these bad boys are absolute pros at sloughing away soap scum and built-up residue. If you're terrified of bathing in your own tub due to unidentified stains, it's time you invested in a Magic Eraser.
20. A Hask shampoo and conditioner set to provide tresses with an extra layer of protection via organic rose oil and peach extract — this duo seals in hair color while also giving bounce, body, and shine. Want to be cast in a shampoo commercial? This is step one toward that royalty check.
21. An Iron Out spray gel for anyone whose cleaning products have been a little ~rusty~ lately. This promises to get rid of hard water rust build-up like it's no one's business.
22. A Gillette shaving cream free of dyes and fragrances, which basically means this won't irritate your nose or skin. This is ideal for anyone with a sensitive complexion (*raises hand*) who doesn't want to break out in hives every time half a thigh is shaved.
23. A power scrubber kit equipped with three different-sized attachments, each one perfect for the corners, floor, and door of your shower. This takes off years of accumulated build-up in just mere minutes, doing a better job than you would have been able to do by hand. In the words of Daft Punk, this is just better, faster, and stronger.
24. A Mrs. Meyer's multi-surface scrub capable of getting rid of grime with little elbow grease required. From scorched pans and crusty faucets to bathtubs in need of serious TLC, say hello to your new favorite cleaning product.
25. A vegan bath soak that enlists the help of organic bladderwrack seaweed to soothe your complexion. Treating your skin is as easy as one, two, lay down in the bath with a good book and preferably some wine (three).
26. A water-based tile pen that'll transform the chore of grout cleaning into a fun activity reminiscent of filling in the pages of an adult coloring book. Consider mold banished after a few swipes of this nontoxic formula, which releases antibacterial agents with each pass.
27. A pack of shower steamers to turn mundane task of scrubbing your scalp — *yawn* boring — into a relaxing ritual. These babies are packed with essential oils (think: lavender vanilla, eucalyptus spearmint, and orange ginger) to add a dash of delicious fragrance to your pm routine.
28. A shower caddy with an adhesive backing strong enough to withstand all of your conditioners (of which you inexplicably have, like, a million). Just peel, stick on your shower wall, wait twelve hours, and you're good to go.
29. A Puracy body wash that lathers beautifully, smells of crisp citrus and sea salt (perfect for groggy mornings), and leaves your skin hydrated. It's also *takes deep breath* nontoxic, vegan, cruelty-free, and has no perfumes or dyes. Whew!
30. An eco-friendly Ethique shampoo bar that adds a ton of body to even the finest of tresses *and* just one bar equals three bottles of liquid shampoo. Volume combined with money saved and avoided plastic = my definition of bliss.
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