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Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?

Blobfish slippers, Fear Street novels, and flamingo ice cube trays: How far can *you* get without buying something?

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We hope you love the products we recommend! Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a share of sales from the links on this page.
Andrew Richard / BuzzFeed

We hope you love the products we recommend! Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a share of sales from the links on this page.

Welcome to another edition of “Can You Get Through This Post Without Spending $50?”

I am your host, AnaMaria. This game is simple: Try to make it through this entire post without taking out your credit card.

Don't need to buy anything? No worries! Scroll through and enjoy my sense of humor. (Disclaimer: I've been told in the past that I'm not funny.)

The following products will be riddled with puns, song lyrics, various movie references, and potential Instagram captions.

Come up with a better line? Drop it in the comments below! I DO READ THOSE!

1. Plush slippers known to say, "I just want the world to sea me for who I am on the inside." Wow. My heart is breaking.

This would be a fantastic beginning for a Pixar film in which the titular character, Blobby, must navigate a world that thinks he's ugly. Get them from Amazon for $29.99. *Want to know a friggin' fact about the blobfish? Scroll down to the bottom of this article, kids!
amazon.com

This would be a fantastic beginning for a Pixar film in which the titular character, Blobby, must navigate a world that thinks he's ugly.

Get them from Amazon for $29.99.

*Want to know a friggin' fact about the blobfish? Scroll down to the bottom of this article, kids!

2. A Fear Street trilogy written by one R.L. Stine: this is his first foray into angsty (and brilliant) teen horror books.

Warning: these books aren't particularly cheerful. You can even say they gave me goosebumps... Get them from Amazon for $5.24+ (first book), $1.18+ (second book), and $2.50+ (third book).
fave.co fave.co fave.co

Warning: these books aren't particularly cheerful. You can even say they gave me goosebumps...

Get them from Amazon for $5.24+ (first book), $1.18+ (second book), and $2.50+ (third book).

3. An organic tomato lip balm that is not edible, which sucks. But I still love it from my head to-ma-toes.

If you don't already own this, you seriously need to ketchup.Get it from Skin Food By AB on Etsy for $8.
etsy.com

If you don't already own this, you seriously need to ketchup.

Get it from Skin Food By AB on Etsy for $8.

4. A sticky note book that often asks incredibly personal questions. Seems to be particularly obsessed with parents.

But actually, id is a great investment for people who like to be organized.Get it from Amazon for $8.95.
amazon.com

But actually, id is a great investment for people who like to be organized.

Get it from Amazon for $8.95.

5. A light sculpture not intended for young werewolves. Being Team Jacob will not exempt you from their wrath.

"There's nothing I can do, a lunar eclipse of the heart..." —Bonnie Tyler singing about her unintended werewolf transformation after encountering the above product. Get it from Urban Outfitters for $34. ***Werewolves now transform at the crescent moon, not a full one. Duh.
urbanoutfitters.com

"There's nothing I can do, a lunar eclipse of the heart..." —Bonnie Tyler singing about her unintended werewolf transformation after encountering the above product.

Get it from Urban Outfitters for $34.

***Werewolves now transform at the crescent moon, not a full one. Duh.

6. A heat-changing mug for "Yellow Submarine" dwellers who want to drink coffee whilst holding someone's hand.

amazon.com

🎶 Ringo 'round the coffee... 🎶

Get it from Amazon for $17.95.

7. A phone case featuring a certain hotel heiress who's known to be a party animal. Her dad owns a chain of sea anemone's.

Personally? I hate parties. They make me feel like a fish out of water. Get it from Nordstrom for $24.
click.linksynergy.com

Personally? I hate parties. They make me feel like a fish out of water.

Get it from Nordstrom for $24.

8. Socks designed to make your feet more worldly. Your toes will be begging to attend art festivals and Sundance.

The original title of the song was actually "I've Got The Whole World On My Feet." Seriously! Google it! Why don't you believe me! Get them from Amazon for $9.99.
amazon.com

The original title of the song was actually "I've Got The Whole World On My Feet."

Seriously! Google it! Why don't you believe me!

Get them from Amazon for $9.99.

9. And portrait socks that are slightly unsettling. I'm not sure. Maybe ear-y is a better word to describe them?

"I'll never let Gogh!" —Rose from Titanic, holding on to these socks for dear life. Get them from Amazon for $12.
amazon.com

"I'll never let Gogh!" —Rose from Titanic, holding on to these socks for dear life.

Get them from Amazon for $12.

10. A panini press that'll transform you into a celebrity chef who criticizes meals on reality TV and Twitter.

Your sandwiches are bland. You make idiot sandwiches. It is pressing that you get the above product immediately. Okay?Get it from Amazon for $32.33.
amazon.com

Your sandwiches are bland. You make idiot sandwiches. It is pressing that you get the above product immediately. Okay?

Get it from Amazon for $32.33.

11. Sandwich bags guaranteed to make people stay away from your lunch. No one will dare app~roach~ it.

It bugs me when people try to take my food, okay? Get them from Amazon for $7.18.
amazon.com

It bugs me when people try to take my food, okay?

Get them from Amazon for $7.18.

12. Cactus and flamingo ice cube trays. Pro tip: freeze coffee. Make coffee cubes. Live your life. You're welcome.

urbanoutfitters.com, urbanoutfitters.com

These ice cube trays go to a party. The cactus tray is in a bad mood. Their conversation goes as follows: "Stop being so prickly! You need to learn how to flamingle."

Get them from Urban Outfitters for $19 (left) and $19 (right) or from Amazon for $17 (left) and $19 (right).

13. A magnetic poetry kit that'll turneth your fridge into an ice box full of leftovers and witty banter.

Scenario: You have just arranged a truly brilliant prose for your fridge. It is sheer genius. You are a sheer genius. Instagram caption on photo of prose: "Clearly, some people have greatness thrust upon ’em."Get it from Amazon for $12.95 (also available in 20 different themes, such as Edgar Allen Poe.)
amazon.com

Scenario: You have just arranged a truly brilliant prose for your fridge. It is sheer genius. You are a sheer genius.

Instagram caption on photo of prose: "Clearly, some people have greatness thrust upon ’em."

Get it from Amazon for $12.95 (also available in 20 different themes, such as Edgar Allen Poe.)

14. A fairy bread candle loved by Tinker Bell. Celeb endorsements not enough for you? This bad boy has a burn time of 25+ hours!

I'm fairy sure that this is Tink's favorite. TMZ has confirmed it. #ad #sponGet it from Form and Flux on Etsy for $17.49.
etsy.com

I'm fairy sure that this is Tink's favorite. TMZ has confirmed it. #ad #spon

Get it from Form and Flux on Etsy for $17.49.

15. A wall clock featuring New Zealand-based vampires Vladislav, Viago, and Deacon from What We Do in the Shadows.

This clock is seriously fangtastic.Get it from KP Designs on Society6 for $30. Stop! Drop! Roll! If you have not seen What We Do in the Shadows, I demand that you watch it right this second. Run toward your smart TV. Flock to your Macbook. It is a vampire mockumentary masterpiece. Watch it.
society6.com

This clock is seriously fangtastic.

Get it from KP Designs on Society6 for $30.

Stop! Drop! Roll! If you have not seen What We Do in the Shadows, I demand that you watch it right this second. Run toward your smart TV. Flock to your Macbook. It is a vampire mockumentary masterpiece. Watch it.

16. An alleged jewelry holder that will actually steal your belongings. Why? Because it's bad to the bone.

But in all seriousness, this will really come in handy. Get it from Amazon for $44.98 or Apollo Box for $55.99.
amazon.com

But in all seriousness, this will really come in handy.

Get it from Amazon for $44.98 or Apollo Box for $55.99.

17. Bow earrings made to hold your airpods in place while you're exercising and being active. Ah, airpods. Thank you, Apple!

Regular headphones? They're so bow-ring.Get them from Fab for $48.
fab.com

Regular headphones? They're so bow-ring.

Get them from Fab for $48.

18. ABC gum magnets representative of love in general: it will chew you up and spit you out.*

Whoever left this note must feel a strong magnetic attraction. Get them from Amazon for $7.41. *I don't actually think that, but this is the dialogue that begins every cheesy YA novel.
amazon.com

Whoever left this note must feel a strong magnetic attraction.

Get them from Amazon for $7.41.

*I don't actually think that, but this is the dialogue that begins every cheesy YA novel.

19. Geode pillows trying to clear their bad reputation: they may look as hard as a rock, but they're actually very comfortable.

fab.com, fab.com

These pillows seriously rock.

Get them from Fab for $40+ (left) and $40+ (right).

20. Gorgeous rings you can customize with your own name, or that of a loved one. *uses her own name*

Wow. Those names have a nice ring to 'em. Get them from Kathryn Riechert on Etsy for $24+.
etsy.com

Wow. Those names have a nice ring to 'em.

Get them from Kathryn Riechert on Etsy for $24+.

Well, arrivederci for now! If you're looking for more fun, be sure to check out the "Can You Get Through This" challenge from last week!

ABC

Fact time, below!

Hello. This is what a blobfish looks like underwater. It resembles a normal fish, not a gelatinous blob.

youtube.com

Did you already know this, or is your mind blown? Because my mind was blown.