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Fashion Mailbag: Do Sticker Bras Work?

Once a week, BuzzFeed Shift editor Amy Odell answers your fashion questions in the Fashion Mailbag. The feature starts today with answers about bras that stick to you, Katy Perry's hair, and stubble.

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How big do your boobs have to be before those stick-on bra cups don't work?

Why, you must be referring to the illusive adhesive bra! The bra that attaches to human flesh like a sticker. Such as: the Fashion Forms Nu Bra Ultralite Backless Bra:


They come in all varieties, like this other Fashion Forms one that is basically a big sculpted Band Aid:


You might think that the smaller your breasts are, the more likely these gigantic pasties are to help you achieve the desired sartorial effect, be it to hide your nipples under a backless gown or top, and/or give support under your backless garment. I think the question is less about how big your boobs have to be before the sticky bras don’t work than do they even work at all? And are they worth the 30 some-odd bucks? Yes, that might buy you 50 sticks, according to the product description, but will you even make it past stick number one? Because you’re likely to encounter these issues:

1. Aim. You have to aim the bra at your boobs just right, because if you mis-stick you have to peel the fresh sticky stuff right off that delicate skin if you want to try again. And if you’re using the flimsy stick-on kind with no cups, you’re likely to just have to throw them out.

2. Having the right shoulders. Some of these things come with straps that loop over the shoulders so that you wear the bra like a forward-facing backpack. A PR person sent me a non-adhesive version of these, once, and it stayed on just about as well as... a forward-facing backpack. Like, If it had a spot between the boobs for a baby bjorn, I would definitely never ever EVER put a baby in it. When it comes to one’s bra falling off in public when you’re wearing a backless item of clothing, the same level of caution probably applies for most chicks. It’s possible I just have the wrong (read: downward-sloping shoulders) to pull this style off, but it was such a bother, thinking about how to sit or stand so that you don’t drop the bra.

3. Support. I don’t think they give it. I think they can prevent embarrassing nipping if you’re gown is white jersey, or something, but I think you’ve got to be okay with a bit of an unsupported effect, should you get trashed at the party and start dancing wildly.

Personally, I don’t buy things unless you can wear a bra underneath them, or the fabric is so tight or thick that you can get away without a bra. It’s bad enough women are expected to wear painful-ass shoes — must we also wear bothersome-ass boob stickers?

But, as far as large breasts and the adhesive bra go, I asked a friend who is something like a DD, and she said that she tried a sticky bra and it was “an immediate fail.” However, she did once have success once using double-sided tape to help affix a slinky halter dress to her bosom, which is what I’d recommend in lieu of the sticky bra for most people. Just tape that shit down. J. Lo does it, like, daily.

How do celebrities like Katie Perry color their hair so often and not have it dry out/fall out?

Easy! They are make of durable plastic, like dishwasher-safe tupperware, but thanks to constant spa treatments and calcification via partying, even more difficult to deface with chemicals.

Har har, not really. Bumble & Bumble’s lead colorist Zoe Wiepert answers your question thusly:

“Condition condition condition.... I love white beachy ends and fly aways and think they are key to a modern look but if you don't have the right products on your hair to help the condition, you wont get the soft smooth look or feel, because hair strands are DEAD CELLS. You have to ensure you are adding moisture to it. Look for rich nourishing ingredients like Shea butter, Sesame seed oil, Jojoba seed oil and soy protein to rebuild the cuticle.

[WARNING: Shameless plug ahead.] “I love the new Bumble and Bumble Colorminded Conditioner and a really versatile styler in the line called the UV Protective Styling Balm... you can use on wet or dry hair and it imparts nourishment as well as styling benefits.

“Also keep in mind a lot of times when you see celebrities change their hair color drastically its often a human hair lace front wig that looks completely natural. I color wigs for editorials and the final look can be very realistic.

“Additionally, don't forget about diet. You are what you eat, so if your eating healthy then your hair will be stronger as well.”

Also, don’t do drugs!!!! Talk about a quick way to age/ruin your body and all that it produces, just generally.

I am a man. I have a magazine job in Manhattan and live in Brooklyn. I now have an electric shaver that I use to have a permanent five o'clock shadow. Do you think this is cheesy?

Why, I believe you have highlighted a recent man trend! Man trends don’t come along as often as woman trends, so this is refreshing. Yes, razors designed to leave some stubble behind, to give a city-dwelling metrosexual like yourself a rugged look, are flourishing in the men’s beauty market. And I get it: you want to look as though you do manual labor with your hands and bulging forearms but psh, you own the 5 o’clock shadow razor and so of course you don’t do that.

Is it cheesy? In principle, yes: owning such a razor or electric trimmer is cheesy. But in terms of look, I would say it depends. Are you you pairing your stubble with Windexed diamond chains, a waxed chest, and tan from a booth? Then yes: totally cheesy. Do you sport plaid shirts, mussed hair, and a nasty (read: cool) set of work boots? Then no, not cheesy — you have simply acheived the lumberjack look young men have been lascivious for since they united around the existence of plaid about 12 years ago.


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