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45 Random, Busty, And Sparkly Cannes Fashion Highlights

Also: Justin Timberlake, who clearly has a really bad hair mousse addiction.

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4. Zachary Quinto was like, "The dress is almost there from a fashion perspective but it has that painted-on look that cheapens things."

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You know thats what he was thinking — he's wearing a patterned bowtie.

5. And Joan Smalls is like, "I was supposed to have the most eye-catching neckline here."

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You can't compete with Irina in the puffy shirt of red carpet gowns.

6. Jessica Chastain resisted the temptation to cut random holes in this purple tank gown.

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Maybe because you'd probably need a saw to get through all that beading. And ugh, isn't wearing 10 ball gowns a day because you're in Cannes enough?

9. "WORSHIP AT THE HEM OF MY SLIMMING PRINTED COLUMN DRESS THAT WOULD LOOK HIDEOUS ON ANY NORMALLY PROPORTIONED PERSON."

14. I can never get enough jumpsuits, personally, so here's one on Rhatha Phongam.

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If that's not a lovely way to permanently attach your top to your pants I don't know what is.

17. Catherine Deneuve forwent the discomfort of projecting sex appeal in exchange for a cozy wrap.

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She's probably done this so many times she just rolled off her couch ten minutes before this started, put on shoes, and went out the door.

19. In case you've been missing sleeves, Rosario Dawson wore an extra bulbous, very crusty set of them.

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Her dress is like, "God these sleeves are stage 5 clingers — don't make me be seen with them."

21. Anais Monory is a beautiful woman who should definitely be on the fashion industry's radar.

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If she's not wearing the hell out of those asymmetrical white tiers, no one's ever worn the hell out of anything.

23. Oh and here's Jessica Hart's front. Were you still wishing you'd seen it earlier or had you forgotten?

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I'd forgotten, personally. That's where jumpsuits come in handy — they're so much more memorable.

28. Dita Von Teese wore exactly what she always wears.

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A feminine, tea length, punchily colored, waist-defining, a-line number. With matching shoes. Cannes is probably the only place where she ever looks slightly underdressed.

29. Ana Pauls also channeled summer music festivals in her white lace dress and crown of flowers.

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I'd have gone for the full diamond tiara, personally. Give the fans something to remember you by.

40. Oh, right — because Marion and her color-blocking were all you could see/think about for miles.

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Finding Zoe is like trying to find a shred of sanity in Lady Gaga's brain — almost impossible but you know it's there somewhere.

41. French actress Alyson Le Borges went with that "just had sex" look.

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Just another way to play off the fact that she looks exactly like Girls star Allison Williams, really.

Correction: An earlier version of this item misidentified Alyson Le Borges as Allison Williams (5/23).