1.
Walk around with a bunch of driftwood taped to your face.
2.
Make sure the driftwood matches your monochromatic outfit.
3.
If you're feeling tired one day, you can settle for this more minimalist wood-on-face approach.
4.
Make sure you paint your entire face black if you plain to go for the black wood look.
5.
Employ patchwork sweaters and ill-fitting track pants at once.
6.
Wear funky tracksuits you could see Rihanna wearing between her car and a building.
7.
Gorilla arms flatter no one, but should be worn regardless.
8.
Wear everything awkward in your closet at once.
9.
Your coats should resemble crop tops.
10.
Pair your cropped coats with baggy, pleated pants.
11.
Fear not turtlenecks in unforgiving fabrics.
12.
Vest-wearing dogs are your best accessory.
13.
Wear tiny animals all over your clothes.
14.
Look like you walked straight out of a Wes Anderson movie.
