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1. You can’t walk down the street without bumping into someone you know.
2. You want to slap every summer visitor who feeds the seagulls chips with a wet fish.
3. This is a normal wildlife spot. Nothing that special about it.
4. You get the shorts on and go wading into the sea at Ganavan at the first glimpse of the sun.
5. You meet your friend’s parents or grandparents and they start asking who you are and who are your parents. They end up knowing your own family tree better than you do.
6. Some things are just fact. Like the fact that fish just is better back home.
7. You forget every time just how long 3 hours is when there’s no wifi or 3G to keep you entertained on the Glasgow train.
8. But your 3G is pretty strong in town if you find it in that one spot on the pavement.
9. You’ve been hungover as all hell because “a quiet few” ended up with you dancing in The Lorne til 2am.
10. You aren't doing your duty if you don't correct people when they call it "McCaig’s Folly"
11. You battled a seagull for your lunch at least once on your way back to school from Tesco
12. You can tell city folk your hometown doesn’t have a club, but it does have a ceilidh house.
13. And that ceilidh house, McTs? It has stolen your dignity and refuses to give it back.
14. You know that only a teuchter can call another teuchter 'teuchter'.
15. And no matter where you are in the world, there’s a part of you that yearns to be back on the west coast
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