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This Is The Only Pizza You Should Call A Pizza Pie

Knife and fork definitely required. Happy Pi Day.

Design by Alice Mongkongllite / BuzzFeed. Photos by Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

This is a pizza:

Flickr: navin75 / Creative Commons

These are pies:

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

But some people insist on referring to pizza as "pizza pie" or even just "pie." (!) Come ON GUYS, that doesn't make sense. This is obviously not a pie:

Flickr: dippy_duck / Creative Commons

This linguistic inconsistency would, for example, be very confusing to aliens!!!!

Here is how to make a REAL pizza pie:

1. First, lay a pie crust down in a greased 9-inch pie dish.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

We used a purchased pie crust because #timeforthat

2. There will be extra crust hanging over the edge. Roll it in so that you have a thick, rolled edge all the way around the rim of the pie dish.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

3. Crimp the edges by pressing both thumbs into the crust about an inch apart, then squeezing them together.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

4. Poke the bottom of the crust about 10 times with a fork.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

This keeps air from getting trapped under the crust and creating bubbles under the pie.

5. Brush the whole crust with an egg wash (one egg whisked with 1 tablespoon of water), then bake it for 10 minutes in a 425°F oven, until it's starting to brown.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

To keep the crust from getting too soggy, you need to bake it a little bit before you add the fillings. If you have dried beans or pie weights, put a sheet of parchment paper over the pie crust, fill it with the beans or pie weights, then blind bake. If you don't have pie weights or dried beans, you can just blind bake the pie crust without them. You might get some bubbles, but it isn't the end of the world.

6. Beat four eggs in a large mixing bowl, add 2 cups of ricotta cheese, mix everything together, and pour the ricotta mixture into the crust.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

7. Smooth it out.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

8. Add a cup of your favorite tomato sauce.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

Homemade or store bought. This is obviously a judgement-free zone.

9. Spread it out over the ricotta filling.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

10. Add about a cup of shredded mozzarella cheese.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

11. Finish with some pepperoni, if you want.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

Really, you can add any topping.

12. Bake in the 425°F oven for 20 minutes. The ricotta filling will be almost set but still a little jiggly.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

You don't want it to be rock solid. This is a pizza pie, not a pizza quiche.

13. Let it cool for at least 15 minutes, then slice and serve.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed

Pizza Pie (But, For Real Though)

Serves 8

INGREDIENTS

1 9-inch pie crust (store bought or homemade)

5 eggs, separated

2 cups ricotta cheese

1 cup tomato sauce (store bought or homemade)

1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese

10-12 slices pepperoni (optional)

PREPARATION

1. Preheat the oven to 425°F and grease a 9-inch pie dish.

2. Press the crust into the greased pie dish. There will be extra crust hanging over the edges; tightly roll up the excess crust in towards the pie dish so that it forms a ring around the edge of the dish. Crimp the rolled edge: Press both thumbs into the edge about an inch apart, then pinch them together. Continue all the way around until the whole crust is crimped. Poke the bottom of the crust a few times with a fork.

3. Beat one egg with one tablespoon of water to make an egg wash, then brush it over the entire surface of the pie crust.

4. Blind bake your pie crust: To keep the crust from getting too soggy, you need to bake it a little bit before you add the fillings. If you have dried beans or pie weights, put a sheet of parchment paper over the pie crust, fill it with the beans or pie weights, and bake for 10 minutes in the preheated oven, just until the edges are starting to brown. If you don't have pie weights or dried beans, you can just bake the pie crust without them for 10 minutes in the preheated oven (you might get some bubbles, but it isn't the end of the world).

5. While the crust is in the oven, whisk the remaining four eggs in a large mixing bowl, then mix in the ricotta to combine.

6. When the crust has finished blind baking, pour in the ricotta filling and smooth it out evenly inside the crust. Add the tomato sauce and spread it into an even layer over the ricotta. Sprinkle the cheese on top. Add the pepperoni, if you're using it.

7. Bake in the 425°F oven for 20 minutes. The ricotta filling will be almost set, but still a little jiggly.

8. Let the pizza pie cool for at least 15 minutes, then slice and serve!

Now THAT'S a pie.

Lauren Zaser / BuzzFeed
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