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Earthbound Spouses Cash In On Mars One Candidates

Husbands and Wives Of Mars One applicants urge the candidates to raise their life insurance policies.

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WORLDWIDE-- After careful consideration, Mars One, a dutch non-profit, has narrowed down 200,000 applicants, all of whom wish to travel to the Red Planet in 2024. Husbands and wives of the remaining 100 candidates have quickly urged their partners to increase their spouse's life insurance policies, while the first team to Mars has yet to be officially announced.

"Jackpot!," one husband shouted, before clarifying-- "I mean, I'd really like to go because of the kids. I should have name the third one 'Bankruptcy.' But now, my wife will have enough money to raise those three wallet-mongering heathens alone. Mars equals Money, baby!"

Companies like Metlife, Allstate and Liberty Mutual have refrained from comment after rejecting applicants for "reasons which shall remain unknown," but some applicants believe the insurance giants do not have faith in the mission.

Meanwhile, Mars One applicants who listed their marital status as "single," are now planning weddings; there has been a sharp increase in engagements over the last month. One new fiancée shared-- "It's really the time for us to get married. I admire who he wants to be and what he wants to do. And if he wants to die on Mars, that's his choice. I'll finally be able to pay off my student loans."

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