David Harbour Is Playing Santa In “Violent Night,” And The First Trailer Is Already A Jolly Good Time

    Yes, you read all of those words correctly, and in the right order. Merry holidays.

    Y'all, there's a long and proud(???) history of Santa Claus being portrayed as a somewhat violent figure in cinema. I mean, the man does break into your house and demand a sacrifice* in exchange for gifts, after all.

    Well, it looks like we've got another entry into the "Santa as an absolute maniac" cinematic universe (the SAAAMCU) in the form of the new action/comedy Violent Night, which got its first trailer this week!

    Starring everyone's favorite police-officer-turned–father figure, David Harbour, as Kristopher "I'm going to beat your ass down with a candy cane" Kringle, our film sees less of a traditional horror-style Santa (think Silent Night, Deadly Night, or Santa Slay). Instead, we're getting action-movie, "John Wick of the North Pole" style Santa.

    When a wealthy family goes away for the holidays, they gift their adorable young daughter, Trudie, a walkie-talkie that they note is "a direct line to Santa."

    But their holiday merriment gets turned upside-down when a band of bad guys enters their abode with plans to rob them of $300 million. Also, hey, John Leguizamo!

    Well, that doesn't sit too well with Santa. So, when Trudie radios him asking for help, he's ready to rumble. Yet another reason to try and get on Santa's nice list, because apparently, he'll knock some skulls together on your behalf.

    Anyway, Santa goes on to kick all kinds of butt, do some really violent manuvers, and literally blow a man up — and that's just what's shown in this trailer!

    He also says this line, out loud, which I will be thinking about for the next week:

    Overall, this looks ridiculous...ly fun. It looks fun. It looks like a good time, and I like good times. I hope people dress up as Santa to go. I hope some theater somewhere does a "mall Santas only" screening of it. I hope the real Santa is out there somewhere laughing hysterically.

    So, there you have it! Be sure to leave out some milk and cookies and catch Violent Night when it hits theaters Dec. 2!

    Oh, and you can watch the full trailer here:

    View this video on YouTube

    Universal Pictures

    Also, who do you think would win in a fight: John Wick or Santa? Leave your pick in the comments below.