1. Some of Hollywood's brightest stars were strutting their stuff on the red carpet:
2. And there were also plenty of couples competing for my fictional Oscar for Best Power Couple Who'll Make You Believe in Love Again:
3. Janelle Monáe and Billy Porter opened the show with a glorious dance number, calling out the Oscars' snubs and lack of diversity:
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4. And, when they took to the audience, Brad Pitt did NOT want to sing when his turn came:
Brad Pitt is literally all is us when the professor looks at you but you don’t know the answer to their question #Oscars
5. Then, Chris Rock and Steve Martin took to the stage to definitely NOT host by giving a fun monologue in which they threw A LOT of shade at the Academy:
7. After a musical montage honoring the Best Original Song winners of the past, Eminem came out of freakin' nowhere to shock the audience with a live performance of "Lose Yourself"...and the reactions were hilarious:
8. Maya Rudolph and Kristen Wiig presented the awards for Best Production Design and Best Costume Design, and reminded all of us that they should host every awards show, ever:
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9. And, during Maya and Kristen's presentation, Billie Eilish made this very meme-able face:
10. Taika Waititi won the Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay for Jojo Rabbit, and he, Natalie Portman, and Timothée Chalamet took THIS photo together backstage:
11. Laura Dern took home the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress for her role in Marriage Story, and used her time onstage to thank her mom and dad, Diane Ladd and Bruce Dern:
12. While introducing Idina Menzel, Josh Gad made this A+ joke about John Travolta's now-infamous mispronunciation of her name at the 2014 Academy Awards:
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13. Idina Menzel then took to the stage to perform "Into the Unknown" from Frozen 2, along with the voice actors for nine other Elsas around the world:
14. There was a mini Something's Gotta Give reunion when Diane Keaton and Keanu Reeves took the stage to present the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay:
15. Renée Zellweger took home the Oscar for Best Actress for her role in Judy, and she gave a touching tribute to Judy Garland:
16. Elton John and Bernie Taupin took home the Oscar for Best Original Song for “(I’m Gonna) Love Me Again,” which was featured in his biopic, Rocketman:
17. Bong Joon-ho won Best Director for Parasite, and made Martin Scorsese emotional when he spoke about how he'd influenced him when he was young:
18. Rebel Wilson and James Corden presented the Oscar for Best Visual Effects, while simultaneously shading Cats in the most hilarious, nightmare-inducing way imaginable:
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19. Billie Eilish gave a stunning performance of the Beatles' classic "Yesterday," while the "In Memoriam" played:
20. Joaquin Phoenix took home the Oscar for Best Actor for his role in Joker and gave the most emotional speech of the night, ending it with a lyric written by his late brother, River Phoenix:
21. Bong Joon-ho's Parasite FREAKIN' DOMINATED the entire show, shattering all kinds of records, and became the first foreign-language film to take home the biggest award of the night, Best Picture:
22. And — when the lights cut off during their Best Picture acceptance speech — the front row (including Tom Hanks and Charlize Theron) used their collective star power to demand the lights be turned back on, so that the Parasite producers could finish their MUCH-DESERVED thank-yous in what was truly the most delightful moment of the night:
