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How Miami Are You, Bro?

What's the best way to ride out a hurricane? At a hurricane party, obviously.

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  1. It's super easy, bro. Like, just check off all of the things you've done.
    Joe Raedle / Getty Images
    Check
    Called anyone/everyone bro
    Check
    Used "No, yeah" to mean "Yes"
    Check
    Used "Yeah, no" to mean "No"
    Check
    Worn a sweater when the temperature dropped below 75 degrees
    Check
    Eaten at Pollo Tropical
    Check
    Told others about the wonders of Pollo Tropical
    Check
    Sang along with the Pollo Tropical commercial theme song
    Check
    Had a party during a hurricane
    Check
    Shopped at Burdines
    Check
    Visited Santa's Enchanted Forrest
    Check
    Tried to explain Santa's Enchanted Forrest to someone NOT from Miami
    Check
    Spoken some form of Spanglish
    Check
    Said that someone was "So random"
    Check
    Pretended like you don't know what a turn signal is
    Check
    Started your morning with cafecito
    Check
    Cursed the never-ending construction on the Palmetto Expressway
    Check
    Rolled your eyes when someone sang Will Smith's "Miami" to you
    Check
    Ridden the Metrorail
    Check
    Skipped school to go to the beach
    Check
    Seen a concert at Bayfront Ampitheater
    Check
    Described driving somewhere more than 20 minutes away as "a mission"
    Check
    Used the term "Eating shit" to describe hanging out or doing nothing
    Check
    Eaten at La Carreta
    Check
    Been to the festival at Calle Ocho
    Check
    Replaced the word "very" with "super"
    Check
    Played dominoes at a family gathering
    Check
    Went on a date to the Dade County Youth Fair
    Check
    Saw your cousin's friend's band play at Churchill's in Little Haiti
    Check
    Broke a sweat just walking to your mailbox in the summer
    Check
    Flown out of Ft. Lauderdale just so you didn't have to deal with MIA

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