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I'm Literally Baffled By These 12 Weird Things British People Thought About Americans In 2022

"British people complaining about 'stealing' is objectively hilarious."

Taskmaster! Idris Elba! The Beatles! British people are brilliant and talented...except when they aren't. Over the past year, I found 12 bizarre things that Brits thought about Americans, and now I will lovingly — and gleefully — mock them for it.

For any British people reading, you can return fire in the comments. I have no doubt that you'll do our centuries-old conflict justice.

1. Americans don't have electric kettles

@stefanroberts Genuinely don't understand how Americans get by without kettles. I don't even drink tea and use it for about three different daily tasks.

Twitter: @craigcavyleader

The long-held myth persists! For some reason, Brits STILL refuse to believe that we have and use electric kettles in America — despite the fact that THE FIRST ELECTRIC KETTLE WAS MADE IN AMERICA.

a comment that says, "and plus they microwave their cuppa"

2. Americans stole the uniquely British concept of "meat wrapped in pastry"

Or, as the brilliant American TikToker, Rynnstar, put it:

"British people complaining about 'stealing' is objectively hilarious"

3. American cuisine is limited to hamburgers, pizza, and instant foods

people sitting on couches

4. Americans drink "squash" (a some-assembly-required juice-like drink)

a question "Do they not have squash in America?" and answer "As a Brit, I thought some of this everyone said"

5. Americans are pleasant, nice, and generally happy people (decidedly untrue)

"Basically America is the happy person that makes you wonder if they have felt anything negative before and England is a grumpy old neighbour"

6. Americans only say "fall," not "autumn"

"Americans don't say 'autumn'"

7. Americans would be sent into a coma if we ever encountered cities, bros, corner shops, or Razor scooters

British things that would send Americans into a coma: blackpool, the driving test, a year 7, chavs, a British council estate, one hit in the shin from a razor scooter, one Sunday morning under 12s football match, a brain licker, a corner shop

8. Each street has thousands of houses

"I enjoyed writing the wedding invites for my husband's American crew; how are there 6,000 houses on your streets? Kalamazoo is also an excellent word"

9. Americans don't know how much Brits dislike us (we do), but we'd care a lot if we knew (we don't)

@AaronRHanlon I think you overestimate how much Americans care about what the ordinary British person thinks about them.

Twitter: @citizen_sanders

It may seem a little hypocritical of me to concur that Americans don't really care what British people think of us in a BuzzFeed post about what British people think about Americans. But here's the thing: As soon as I submit this piece, I will immediately forget about it until the TikTok algorithm decides I need to see some Brits vs. Americans content on my FYP again. I hope you, too, can know peace like this.

10. American BuzzFeed writers who use hyperbole and irony must be 100% sincere

headline "I, An American, Was Flabbergasted by These 100% Real British Terms — How Many Do You Know?"

11. Americans don't use or understand sarcasm

comments from Americans that British people were surprised they understood sarcasm

Case in point: This American woman was out with friends in London. They went to get food at 3:30 a.m., but the McDonald's was closed. Three British men overheard her joke that "I guess this really isn't a free country after all if your McDonald's isn't open." They thought she was serious and lost their entire minds.

You can watch the whole story here:

@nazaroundtheworld

Replying to @melbell1288 i definitely think people take american sarcasm far too literally! #american #uk #sarcasm

♬ original sound - Naz | Around The World

12. And finally, the US doesn't have any history

a man raising his eyebrows
comment that says "We have history" and an arrow pointing to "we" with the words "'we' = Brits"

🇺🇸 At least 2022 didn't include more "I can't believe Americans ACTUALLY have yellow school buses" discourse — I don't think any of us could live through another 365 days of that. 🇬🇧

Americans, did I miss anything? And Brits, did Americans think weird things about y'all this year?? Let me know in the comments! 👇

The year is almost over, and we're looking back on 2022. Check out more from the year here!