1. Never accept a first offer.
2. Find friends you can relate to.
3. Cultivate your vocabulary.
4. Avoid high school boys.
5. When learning to drive, don't bother practicing parking.
6. Accept the United States' inherent diversity.
7. Use illicit substances in moderation.
8. Roll with the punches.
9. Whenever a boy comes, you should always have something baking.
10. Avoid the freeway at all costs...
11. Val parties are not worth it.
12. Suck and blow is a game.
13. Hamlet did not say, "To thine own self be true."
14. Sometimes you have to show a little skin.
15. Everywhere in L.A. takes 20 minutes to get to.
16. Never go for a guy who dresses better than you do.
17. Sometimes you need a complete makeover.
18. Be generous.
19. Elevate a classmate to popularity.
20. Watch out for your dad's health.
21. An imperfect guy might be perfect for you.
22. It's OK not to know everything.
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