The 5 Stages Of Unemployment

Experiencing unemployment is a lot like going through the 5 stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. The only difference is that when you’re unemployed, these stages occur in reverse order.

1. Acceptance

“Unemployment is awesome! I can do anything with my life! The sky’s the limit! I’m going to start my own company and buy Google with my first paycheck!”

2. Depression

“Everyone is rejecting me… Can’t get a job without experience; can’t get experience without a job… I suck at life.”

3. Bargaining

“Dear Yogurtland: I will pay you to let me work for you.”

4. Anger

“F*ck you, Yogurtland. Next time I’m in the mood for some of your delicious creamy froyo goodness I’m gonna get a few sample cups and then LEAVE you yogurt-slinging WHORE.”

5. Denial

“I’m not unemployed, I just tell my friends and family that to make them feel better about their own lives.”

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