Skip To Content

    Examining Abercrombie's Homoerotic "Life As A Greeter" YouTube Series

    There were only two episodes, but we'll always have the memories. And these gifs.

    Abercrombie & Fitch celebrates the opening of any new store by unleashing shirtless hotties on the city in question.

    They're shirtless. That's all they do.

    But A&F take the caliber of their "greeters" so seriously that they don't just rely on local talent.

    They fly their finest sets of abs and biceps around the world, to make the best impression possible at each opening.

    Like this.

    And this.

    And also this.

    To fully explain just how big a deal their top-tier greeters are, A&F made some YouTube videos about them.

    These are the "opening credits."

    It's like The Real Housewives of Abercrombie basically — giddy privileged folks spouting soundbites they should have really thought about beforehand. Unfortunately "Life As A Greeter" only ran for two episodes back in February — here's hoping for a longer second season — but offered deep and meaningful insight into its characters' lives.

    In other words, there's a lot of abs on show.

    The first episode quickly introduces A&F's finest of the fine. This is Andrew, he's from California.

    On the left is Samuel from Houston.

    And here are some twins whose names I didn't catch because abs.

    There are also lots more guys, too many to gif or screencap when you work in an office where not everyone gets to spend their day watching A&F videos, basically. (Suckers.)

    Anyway so this is the application process for becoming an A&F greeter apparently.

    So yeah.


    As the first episode continues, it's made clear that all greeters have to do is stay ripped and they get to travel the world and ride buses shirtless and wave.

    These are some giddy A&F fans.

    This poor girl is about to pass out.

    (And this is just one of the many "scenes" from the "episodes" that makes no "sense.")

    With the story in place, the second episode discusses the deep bonds A&F's greeters share. They're not just gym bunnies, they're linked 4 lyfe.

    They all talk about how they can travel to each other's countries and go stay with the native greeters and have shirtless sleepovers and massages because when you're travelling you might have a heavy backpack and so it's nice to work the stress of carrying that out before your back gets tense and knotted, you know?

    And because checking out other guys is totally natural.

    Still checking out guys because it's natural, mmkay?

    Sports interlude!

    Innuendo interlude!

    Gratuitous interlude!

    Ok yeah so they play a game of soccer and it's full of giggly hijinks like this.

    And it's all fun and games until someone gets a ball in the balls.

    Anyway that's the end of episode #2

    Presumably the model recovered.

    It's also the end of the "Life As A Greeter" series period, perhaps because they tried to film some more but all the greeters had gotten so close that they weren't just sharing each other's A&F sweatpants but they'd all moved in with each other and stuff and it was a bit weird to film because they had all these inside jokes and pet names for each other and the cameramen felt left out.