2. All other plans are suspended on match day.
If your friends were really your friends, they wouldn’t even ask to do anything else.
3. You’re disappointed when people around you don’t know every song for every player.
8. You spend countless hours watching YouTube compilations of potential transfer targets and youth team phenoms.
9. A key player on your club forcing a move away feels as deep a betrayal as a real friend stabbing you in the back.
*cue Gooner tears*
10. You’ll even watch half-speed, meaningless preseason friendlies.
14. You get irrationally upset about “international breaks” because they take time away from the important games.
And if anyone from your team is involved, all you’re thinking is “please don’t get injured, please don’t get injured.”
16. Years of watching games (and playing Football Manager) have convinced you that you could run a club better than 90% of Premier League managers.
Everyone on Twitter also knows you think this.
18. Martin Tyler gives you goosebumps.
20. Even if they don’t play for your club, you’re upset to see marquee players leave England ‘cause you’ll get to watch them so much less.
24. No matter how old you are, you have no shame about wearing full kit.
29. You know that no matter what else is happening in your life, there will always be the next game to look forward to, and that it will be great.
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