Days, man. days.Around 10 minutes.There is no predicting it.A matter of seconds.A couple of hours.Depends on the partner.
You can’t remember.This past month, which typically means you won’t see any action soon.Yesterday, but it wasn’t all that spectacular.Last week.Not since last summer.Last year.
PatagoniaJapanHawaiiOklahomaYellowstone National ParkFlorida
Hot tubShowerSaunaIn the woodsVibrating motel bedAirplane bathroom
What Natural Disaster Do You Fuck Like?
You start off pretty modestly, but, like a talented lover with experience in the ways of the sack, you build up to a pretty remarkable crescendo and last for a long fucking time.
You are hot, dangerous, and unpredictable. You may lie dormant for long stretches of time, but when you do become active, it’s a pretty explosive event.
You are powerful and unforgettable. Much like the aftershocks of a large earthquake, memories of your lovemaking will continue to reverberate long after the initial event.
People might not realize what they are getting into when they first see you. Given some time, though, you are a powerful, wet, messy, and destructive force. One of the most powerful forces to behold.
You are raw power in the bedroom. You are erratic and unpredictable, but your skills are so legendary that people from all around the world brave your wake of destruction to try and capture some sweet pics and videos of you doing your thing.
You treat sex like a wildfire treats a forest. Just like a fire doesn’t torch a forest all the time, you don’t need sex ALL the time either. But, also like a wildfire, when you do get going, it is hot as fuck and a totally regenerative experience.
Science Writer, Fossil Beastmaster
Contact Alex Kasprak at email@example.com.
Got a confidential tip? Submit it here.