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Can You Pick The Right Roommate?

All you want is someone who will wash their dishes and have an HBO Now password.

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  1. Jupiterimages/Thinkstock
    Amir
    Via LarsZahnerPhotography/Thinkstock
    Amir
    Sarah
    Via panic_attack/Thinkstock
    Sarah
    Kousuke
    Via RyanKing999/Thinkstock
    Kousuke
    Claire
    Via Digital Vision/Thinkstock
    Claire
    Gautam
    Via michaeljung/Thinkstock
    Gautam
    Linda
    Via feedough/Thinkstock
    Linda
    Carlos
    Via tetmc/Thinkstock
    Carlos
    Muriel
    Via photobac/Thinkstock
    Muriel
    Andy
    Via Viktor_Gladkov/Thinkstock
    Andy

Can You Pick The Right Roommate?

You got: the wrong roommate

Amir is in med school, and he's always trying to diagnose you with all of these horrible diseases. You've started to suppress all of your coughs and yawns in case he comes up to you and asks to get a look at your tonsils. You guys aren't even that close of friends. It's a little weird.

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You got: the wrong roommate

Sarah has a lot of friends. They're always coming over weirdly late and they only stay for a few minutes before dipping out. Your buzzer rings at all hours of the night, and, come to think of it, you don't really see the same people come by all that often. Some of them seem to be on a schedu— OH. Oh wow. Yeah, Sarah sells drugs.

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You got: the wrong roommate

Kousuke hasn't paid rent in five months. You're taking him to court and it's going to get messy.

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You got: the wrong roommate

Claire is fine. She's not the problem. It's her girlfriend who's the problem. You don't know on what fiery hell-planet Claire found Abby, but you wish she'd put her back. She's loud, she's a snob, she's controlling, and one time you caught her spilling nail polish on YOUR couch. She didn't even clean it up. Eff you, Abby.

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You got: the wrong roommate

Gautam straight up doesn't do his dishes. They'll sit there for literal weeks if you don't do them, and what are you — his maid? You most certainly are not.

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You got: the wrong roommate

Linda wanted to throw an end-of-summer barbecue party on the roof, and even went as far as offering to cook all of the meat. Sounds great, except the meat is Norbert, the mini-pig you thought she was keeping as a pet all this time. RIP Norbert.

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You got: the wrong roommate

Muriel had a room open in her beautiful, rent-stabilized apartment and you thought it would be really chill to live with an older person, but you didn't anticipate the parrots. She has so many of them. The parrots are loud and numerous and they sound like you. After a while, you can't even tell which thoughts are yours anymore.

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You got: the wrong roommate

Andy seemed OK until you got up late at night to get a drink of water and found him peeing in your houseplants. Who does that?

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You got: the right roommate!

Carlos is the IDEAL roommate. He always washes the dishes when he's done with them, lets you know in advance if he's having company over, and never tries to move any of your furniture while you're away from the apartment. He has an Amazon Prime account that he lets you use whenever you want, and occasionally he gets in a mood where he just straight up bakes cookies so the apartment smells like heaven. Never let go of Carlos.

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