Alan Cumming Says His Role In "GoldenEye" Saved His Life And That He Was Suicidal Before Receiving It

    "It was one of the worst days of my life actually."

    Alan Cumming may have landed a starring role in GoldenEye – but the audition was the worst day of his life.

    Alan attends an event

    The actor revealed that before he tried out for the film, he was experiencing one of the "darkest moments" of his life.

    Alan attends an event

    Besides going through a divorce, Alan was dealing with unpacking the trauma of growing up with an abusive father.

    Alan attends an event

    "It was one of the worst days of my life actually," Alan said of the audition during an interview with CBS Mornings.

    Alan attends an event

    He continued, "I felt really, really, really low. I just now think, Oh you poor little thing; you could’ve said, 'I am feeling suicidal today.'"

    Alan attends an event

    Thankfully, things changed after he landed the part — and he credits his career in Hollywood with saving his life.

    Alan in character for GoldenEye

    "That’s something I realized when I was writing [my memoir]; like, oh my god, Hollywood saved me," Alan revealed.

    He added, "I have this sort of mantra, which is ‘Cancel, continue.’ When something bad happens I think, OK, that happened; we can’t change that — let’s move on."

    Alan smiles while attending an event

    Hear all that Alan had to say below.

    View this video on YouTube

    CBS Mornings / Via youtube.com

    The ​National Suicide Prevention Lifeline ​is 1-800-273-8255. Other international suicide helplines can be found at befrienders.org​. ​The Trevor Project,​ which provides help and suicide-prevention resources for LGBTQ youth, is 1-866-488-7386. You can also text TALK to 741741 for free, anonymous 24/7 crisis support in the US and UK from the ​Crisis Text Line​.