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What Would You Look Like As A Penis?

A little bit NSFW, due to dildos and cartoon dicks.

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  1. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
  2. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
  3. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    A top hat
    A top hat
    A giant pretzel
    A giant pretzel
    A bone necklace
    A bone necklace
    Seaweed
    Seaweed
    A 10kg weight
    A 10kg weight
    A hula hoop
    Via Thinkstock
    A hula hoop
    Via Thinkstock
  4. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
  5. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
  6. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
  7. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
  8. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed
    Woody's penis
    Woody's penis
    Tarzan's penis
    Tarzan's penis
    Genie's penis (Genis)
    Genie's penis (Genis)
    Pluto's penis
    Pluto's penis
    Beast's penis
    Beast's penis
    Hercules's penis
    Via Disney
    Hercules's penis
    Via Disney
  9. Thinkstock / BuzzFeed

What Would You Look Like As A Penis?

You got: The Hairy Chode

If you were a penis, you'd be a fat, hairy chode. Before you get disappointed though, remember what they say – it's all about the girth, and you'd have that in abundance.

The Hairy Chode
Sian Butcher / BuzzFeed
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You got: The Boomerang Dick

If you were a dick, you'd be a really curvy one. Like, ~really~ curvy. The sort of penis you could open doors with or hang a picture on. Which is cool, I guess?

The Boomerang Dick
Sian Butcher / BuzzFeed
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You got: The Dog Dick

If you were a dick, you'd be a dog's dick. You'd keep yourself to yourself most of the time, but when you did come out to play, everyone would be more than a bit shocked.

The Dog Dick
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You got: The Veiny Monster

If you were a dick, you'd be a big, veiny monster one. You'd be constantly throbbing, and wouldn't let anything intimidate you. You'd be one confident schlong, getting out in public at any opportunity.

The Veiny Monster
Sian Butcher / BuzzFeed
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You got: The Flamboyant Dick

You'd be a really flamboyant, extravagant dick. You'd have brightly coloured pubes and gem stones stuck all over it, just to make sure you were truly unique, and no one could fail to notice you.

The Flamboyant Dick
Sian Butcher / BuzzFeed
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You got: The Whopper

If you were a dick, you'd be a really massive one – like, absolutely humongous. You'd be so big you'd be a little intimidating, and would also bend slightly to the left.

The Whopper
Sian Butcher / BuzzFeed
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