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    Raisins Are The Fucking Worst, Let's Ban Them Forever

    That's not a chocolate chip.

    Here is a raisin. It wants to ruin your life.

    Raisins exist because one day, someone decided to take a perfectly nice grape and leave it out in the sun for ages so it shrivelled up horribly and died. And then they ate it.

    This is what happens when you do that to an apple. You wouldn't eat this apple.

    This is what happens when you do it to a banana. You wouldn't eat this banana.

    And yet raisins are apparently fine. We accept them. We eat them. We even give them to children.

    Despite the warning sign being right there on the box.

    Raisins are the wasps of the food world. They are small, pointless, and like to ruin your meals.

    This is by far the worst thing about raisins – the amount of otherwise really nice foods they ruin. Like bread and butter pudding.

    Like this apple crumble.

    Like cinnamon buns.

    They're even used to ruin savoury foods, like couscous and curries.

    IS NOTHING SACRED?

    Sometimes though, they do something really, truly evil. Something that can never be forgiven.

    THEY DISGUISE THEMSELVES AS FUCKING CHOCOLATE CHIPS.

    It's almost like they know they suck.

    For all you raisin apologists out there, there is one very important thing you need to keep in mind.

    Every grape made into a raisin, is one less grape made into wine.

    Checkmate, raisins. You suck.