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Do You Know All 12 Gifts From The 12 Days Of Christmas?

But seriously babe, what the hell is with all the birds?

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  1. On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me:

    A fat stripped bird perched on a bush
    pinterest.com / Via pinterest.com
    A fat stripped bird perched on a bush
    A pigeon in a soiled bag of garbage (New York couples only)
    sodahead.com / Via sodahead.com
    A pigeon in a soiled bag of garbage (New York couples only)
  2. On the second day of Christmas my true love sent to me, TWO:

  3. On the third day of Christmas my true love sent to me, THREE:

  4. On the fourth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, FOUR:

  5. On the fifth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, FIVE:

    Editor's Note: You better get this one (I don't care if you're Jewish).

  6. On the sixth da of Christmas my true love sent to me, SIX:

    Geese a Laying
    youtube.com / Via youtube.com
    Geese a Laying
    Calling Birds
    wwsick.com / Via wwsick.com
    Calling Birds
  7. On the seventh day of Christmas my true love sent to me, SEVEN:

    Trutle Doves
    giphy.com / Via giphy.com
    Trutle Doves
    Drummers Drumming
    imgur.com / Via imgur.com
    Drummers Drumming
    Geese a Laying
    youtube.com / Via youtube.com
    Geese a Laying
  8. On the eighth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, EIGHT:

  9. On the ninth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, NINE:

  10. On the tenth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, TEN:

  11. On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love sent to me, ELEVEN:

  12. On the last day of Christmas my true love sent to me, TWELVE:

Do You Know All 12 Gifts From The 12 Days Of Christmas?

You're Like George Bailey Before He Met Clarence

Christmas is just not you're thing. That's cool. Maybe you're Jewish. Maybe you're Muslim. Or maybe you just don't have the time to remember every damn bird this fucker sent to his true love. No harm, no foul. Keep on knocking back those eggnogs and rocking that ugly nondenominational sweater. Or don’t. That’s cool too.

You're Like George Bailey Before He Met Clarence
larrycarlat.com / Via larrycarlat.com
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You're Christmas Tree Needs a Little Love

Even though you may be like really into Christmas, it seems as though Aunt Clara has sent you one too many pink bunny costumes. You’re down with the whole good cheer and joy to the world crap, but when it comes to actual details of the day, you’ll let somebody else sweat over that. You have too much food and far too much alcohol to worry about some stupid swans, turtle doves, or partridges (what the fuck even is that?) and their pear trees.

You're Christmas Tree Needs a Little Love
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Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animal!

Woah. Very impressive. You’re like the love child of Buddy the Elf and Clark Griswold. You throw up candy canes and sugar plums. I bet every time you see a fat white guy with a beard hair you pee (just a little) from excitement. If you could, you would spend the whole year picking out the perfect Christmas tree. You’re ideal day would be making snow angels, ice skating, making Santa cookies, eating Santa’s cookies, feeling guilty for eating Santa’s cookies, eat the rest of the cookie dough because you’re feeling guilty, go to the store to get more cookie dough….etc., listen to Christmas carols, and sing along WORD FOR WORD.

Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animal!
thehandmadehome.net / Via thehandmadehome.net
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